How 'Bout Them Cowboys

I thought the Cowboys had a chance to win the game last night but didn't expect them to take over the game the way they did. Chicago's offense stinks and there is no way the defense can play more than they are being asked to and hope for much better but I have to say the Cowboys have a potent offense. Romo is certainly over the Seattle fiasco and TO is being quiet and playing ball so far. As a psuedo-Cowboy fan, it was a fun game to watch. And going for it on 4th and 3? Wow.
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I wasn't too impressed with the race at Dover yesterday. I don't like short tracks and there were way too many wrecks and malfunctions to make it a race. It was more like a Survivor episode.
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I had a sizeable lead in my fantasy football game yesterday until the Cowboys played. I had the Bears defense. My opponent (Craig) had Marion Barber and Jason Witten. He's now 19 points behind me and has Drew Brees playing the mighty Tennessee Titans defense (ha-ha) tonight. It's going to be a nail-biter.
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Decatur lost their homecoming game last Friday but made it a good game. It seems they are improving every week but it's not going to be a picnic through district this year. Maybe some close games will be fun to watch too.

She Ran

The cross country meet went well and my little angel improved her performance over last year. My favorite part was the last 400 meters or so. As she came by, I shouted for her to pass the girl in front of her. She held up 3 fingers indicating she was going to pass 3 of the girls in front of her. I think it ended up being 5 or 6 and she definitely improved on her finish from the same meet last year. Way to go!
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The Texas Rangers season is coming to another painful end. Last night's loss insured a losing season. I remember going to the games in April and May with hope and have ended the season missing the last two games and not finding anyone who even wanted the tickets. I want to be a fan but it's hard to have to drive an hour and see one loss after another. They barely make the local news now that the Cowboys are 2-0. Sad. The manager and GM have both been given extensions but I have a feeling that if significant improvement isn't made next year, they will be gone.

I'm starting to feel the same way about remaining a ticket buyer.
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It's homecoming for Decatur tomorrow. Huge mums. Queens contest. Packed stadium. I hope the football team can raise their level of play. They have struggled this year compared with prior years and I'm hoping they are in the process of putting it all together for a great run through district. It will be a big Friday night.

Run Girl, Run

Today is the first cross country meet for my daughter. It's in Ponder and not her favorite course (just listening to her description can be a bit funny) but it's the first one so it's a good one in my book. She loaded up on cookies for all her friends so they should be on a sugar high when they take off.

It's amazing to watch her run. When she sprints the last several yards, it's the best because her long legs really get going and she covers some ground. It will be a 2+ mile run...something that would put me in the hospital. I'm excited to go watch her today.
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I got a message early this week that one of my friends from college was killed in an auto accident last weekend. It's too early for this to be happening. Mack leaves a wife and two kids and a lot of people who loved him. As the Sub-T (for those not familiar with Sub-T, it is a fraternity type organization at ACU where I attended college that was often credited with things not in keepng with the schools desires) email wire cranked up, I was struck that the one thing that kept flashing in my mind was the smile that was almost permanent on Mack's face. He brought happiness to many people.

Each year, Subberville is a reunion held in different locales - Abilene of late - and each year they play golf. Starting in 2008, the golf tournament will become the Mack Dennis Memorial Golf Tournament and proceeds will go to a scholarship fund for his kids.

May God grant them peace.

OK, I've Got To Brag A Little...

My wife had our first observed teaching day at school last week. A lady from the Region XI program she is going through came out to watch her work through a class period and grade her on how she did. IT WAS GREAT! She got positive marks across the board. I have to say it was no surprise to me that she did well but I think she was a little nervous going into the day and didn't expect the number of high marks she got. I'm so happy for her and so very proud of her.

I know she will be a wonderful teacher if that is what she chooses to do. She is already wonderful in many, many other ways.

The Beauty of Children

We hosted about 30 3rd-6th grade kids from church at our home last night to eat, play, sing and fellowship. It's fun to turn kids loose for about an hour and watch what they do. Several went and played a game with a football, others jumped on the trampoline, some went to see the llamas next door and others sat in a group and talked. Some were loud, some were quieter but they all seemed to find joy in what they chose to do. They weren't burdened with paying bills, juggling multiple projects and things that needed to be done. In fact, they seemed completely unburdened and 100% involved in the moment. It was a beautiful sight to watch and enjoy.
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I hear the Cowboys won again. I had to leave early for a meeting yesterday and they had just scored a go-ahead touchdown when I was walking out. I'm glad they are winning but I don't think they've played very good teams yet.

I watched some of New England and San Diego last night and NE was dominant. Cheating or not, they are winners.

TO and Randy Moss have been exemplary after two weeks. I wonder how long it will last?

Safety

How safe are you? How safe is your family? It's something I don't think about too often because I generally have a feeling of safety. Something happened yesterday that raised that question for one of my children and the feelings inside of me surprised me. Thoughts ran through my head of "if they hurt my child, I will..." and some of those ideas of what I would do were a little scary. I'm not surprised that I would rise up to defend my child but how quickly and how hostile I went from being a pretty laid-back guy to being ready to go on the offensive. If someone hurts one of my children, what will I do? How far will I go?

As I prayed about it last night, I also begin to think about how God feels when Satan tries to hurt us. How offended is He? How far will He go to defend us, to fight for us? I know God has a much better grip on defending and protecting me than I do on defending and protecting my children. I know God isn't thinking the same thoughts of "what will I do" if someone hurts me like I had if someone hurt my children. God sees so much more than me, understands so much more than me, cares for others so much more than me.

I pray in everything I am forced to deal with, I will look for God's will and design. Afterall, my safety isn't in anything I can do or control but only in what God has already done through Jesus. My safety isn't for here and today, it is for eternity.
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The funeral for our family friend I mentioned a few days ago is today. I won't be able to attend but the Ferguson family is on my mind. If you would, please say a little prayer for that family today and in the day's to come. Their loss is hard but their comfort will be in Molly's love for the Lord and her devotion to Him.

Nothing Today

I'm out of thoughts.
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Are the Rangers still playing? I haven't heard much about them since football season cranked up. It's the sad reality of a team playing below what they should be able to do. I have tickets to games that I can't give away. Sad.
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I heard ESPN ranked the Cowboys as the 5th best team after the first week of play. They are ranked right behind...Da' Bears...who lost their opener to San Diego. Go figure.
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I wasn't really aware of the hurricane that was supposed to hit the Texas coast this morning. I've seen graphics but haven't listened, instead only interested by seeing our temperatures go below 90.
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Another blog I read asked the question yesterday, "what song is stuck in your head?" Since the blogger is one of the very, very few who respond here (is anyone really out there?) I won't expect an answer from him but leave the question for the rest of you to ponder. I really ask only so you will start thinking about the song in your head even more than you already were.
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It's going to be a busy day so I'm off to the mill...

Unexplainable

Yesterday, we lost a close friend of our family. She was a woman as good as gold, a friend to everyone and a servant to all. She died tragically in a house fire created by an explosion of some sort. They are still trying to find out what caused the explosion but it is one of those times when I can't help but wonder why someone so good died in such a horrible way. It doesn't make sense.
Molly Ferguson was a good and virtous person. Her death makes no sense but the people who know her know she is with God today, living a new life that is certainly more beautiful, more peaceful, more glorious than anything we can imagine on earth. She was a good and faithful servant, she ran the race and today is receiving her reward.

Up Early and Running

I love to brag on my kids. They are something special to me and I am pretty sure they are angels God sent to make my earthly life more joyful.

My son is in the band this year and brought his "instrument" home last night and gave me a run down on the names of the different parts. He's excited to be learning notes and how to play and it's amazing to see his excitement for it. I'm so proud of him for trying new things with gusto.

My daughter is working out for cross country and we are getting up at 6:00AM on Tuesday and Thursday mornings plus her regular workouts the other days. This morning I pulled up next to her while she was finishing her run and she took off sprinting. It's a beautiful thing to see her long legs striding out when she kicks it in.

I am so proud of them and I hope they are proud of themselves.

Audacious

Yesterday, my 7th and 8th grade class discussed compassion. I believe the world has seen far too little compassion from Christians. I used to read a local blog and anytime something came up about a church, there were several comments running down Christians for their lack of concern for people. It seems many people hear us arguing over disagreements and don't see us taking care of those in need.

My class curriculum made 3 points. First, be ALERT to people in need - look for opportunities. Second, be ATTENTIVE to those people - do something to help them. Finally, be AUDACIOUS in what you do. I asked the class if they knew what audacious meant and one young lady responded "shamelessly bold." Wow! What would happen if we were shamelessly bold in helping others, in sharing compassion? What would the world see? Jesus. The world would see Jesus if we were shamelessly bold in our compassion for people. The world would see the body of Christ in action.

I believe doctrine is important. I believe teaching the message the Bible teaches for salvation is important. I believe that living as Jesus lived is important. I convict myself that I have spent too much time discussing things that matter without living the things that matter. I convict myself that I have stood on doctrine without reaching out with compassion. Oh, but how I want to be different in the days ahead. If we are the body, if I am the body, I need to be more Christ-like to people who are lost and hurting and need to know someone cares.

I challenged my class yesterday with some specific opportunities they brought up. I believe the younger generation today is much more open to being compassionate, to being audacious in their efforts to pick up the hurting than my generation. I challenged them because they encourage me and their actions will challenge me to be audacious, to be shamelessly bold in sharing compassion.

Go Ahead and Fall

Fall is hear. Texas plays TCU tomorrow. The NFL kicked off in earnest last night. High school footballers are getting ready to bang heads for the second week in a row tonight. The weatherman says cooler weather is coming our way. I really enjoy the fall and as much as I like football and so much of fall, the cooler weather is what really, really makes me a happier person this time of year. _______________________________________________________________

We are hosting the high school youth group Sunday night at our house. I've been privileged getting to know more of our church youth, first through our mission trip to Brazil and then through teaching, and I really enjoy being around them. As with any group, their personalities run the gamut from the loud and boisterous to the quiet and shy. What strikes me about so many of them is their heart. I have seen acts of kindness that surprise me but more than that, they encourage me. I look forward to spending more time with them on Sunday.
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Have a great weekend! Hook 'em Horns!

Leadership

We started a new class last night on leadership, specifically spiritual leadership. Leadership is easy to talk about but, in my own life at least, much harder to model. I enjoy studying it and learning how to be a better leader because I have been put in positions of leadership. Being the leader isnt' something I aspire to, in fact my personality easily allows others to take on a leadership role, but when I am needed to lead, I want to be prepared to do the best I can.

One of my favorite books is titled "The Servant" and is a study of leadership modeled by Jesus. It's a look at what the author terms servant-leadership and it exemplifies the type of leader I want to follow and I want to be.

I pray our churches will raise up strong servant-leaders, people who lead not because they want the power but because they want to serve. I believe we are blessed as a church in Decatur with leaders who do want to serve. As I listened to one of our Elders last night talk about his fear of doing a poor job, it was apparent his biggest concern was whether he was serving others. That is the type of leadership mentality that inspires me because his concern isn't about his position or status but his concern is about his service.

I look forward to the remainder of this class and hope I can learn and then model better leadership, leadership based on the good and perfect example God sent to earth, leadership based on a Savior who came to rescue me from the power of evil, leadership based on the Christ who loves me.

Too Old For Late Nights

I was part of a late night fantasy football draft last night. We have a group from church that plays each year and we got a late start. It ended up being a bit after midnight before we were done. Ouch. We thought we would be done an hour earlier but technology isn't all it's cracked up to be sometimes.

I remember the days where staying up to midnight or a couple of hours later was no big deal. I could get up the next morning and function at a normal level. Nowadays, it's brutal. So, if you see me moving slowly today, I just might be sleep-walking.
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God is so good. I'm trying to learn to trust in Him. I've said it before that I have a strong desire to figure out a way to take care of my own problems instead of sitting back and trying to see what God has in store. I've been working to be better at looking for God and little by little I think I'm getting better at it. It has not been easy for me to let go and seek God in my little storms. I struggle with it daily, minute-by-minute it seems at times. Yet, the more I think about it, I think - I hope - I see improvement. I am confident God is guiding me through some things I'm battling now and my prayer is that I continue to learn to step back and let Him lead me.

Junk

I hope my sick friend got a foot long coney from Sonic on Sunday. I'm sure it's all he needed to get well.

We're trying to have our fantasy football draft tonight. So far, nothing is working the way we want it to. It's going to be messy I'm afriad.

The Rangers were getting smoked by the Royals last night when I finally turned the TV off. It's ugly to get beat bad but even uglier to be losing like that to the Royals. I can't give away tickets to the Rangers right now. Sad.

My son went to the lake yesterday with some friends and had a blast riding the tube. He had the biggest jump of anyone and it was funny listening to the description of his eyes as he went airborne. He slept hard last night which makes me wonder if we should get a boat.

We ate with some friends last night and the kids went out to play football. It's amazing watching them tackle each other and trying to remember how I used to do that. All I could think about last night was how bad that would hurt.

I think I've mentioned that I've taken up walking again thanks to my wife. She's been a great example and encouragement to me. I tore my calf muscle playing basketball a few months ago and the muscle still gets tight when I walk but I can tell there is improvement. Now, my ankles and knees are aching a little bit. I'm realizing I'm not 25 anymore. It's hard to accept but the shooting pain at 3 in the morning make it real clear. Still, I'm thankful I can do what I am doing.

I hope you are having a great day.

The Joys of Retail

I like my job and the people I work with but days like today are a beat down for retailers. While everyone else is off for the holiday, we are still open like any other typical day. We are lucky in that we have 4 observed holidays - New Years Day, July 4th, Thanksgiving Day and Christmas Day. Several retailers are starting to stay open most of those days as well. After doing this for 13 years, I'm thinking some holidays should be required to be observed. That way, I could sleep a little later every once in awhile. Then again, it only seems right to labor on Labor Day.

I hope you are enjoying your day off if you have one.

Friday Night Lights

The Decatur Eagles take to the football field tonight and the fall football season will be underway. I'm looking forward to being in the stands with family and friends, talking and laughing, and watching the Eagles. I'm ready for a fun night.
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Last night was an incredible night for Wise County Christian Counseling. A couple of people shared their personal stories that were incredibly touching. Good food and fellowship were just a side note to the powerful feeling in the air that lives were being touched. One of the most thought provoking comments to me was from Ty Lovell, the minister of Cornerstone Church. He said that WCCC isn't just helping people today but making a difference in the lives of generations to come. That was powerful stuff.
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It's a busy Friday and I'm quite sure I'll be putting in some hours over the weekend but I'm ready for the weekend. I hope you have a great one!

Money, Money, Money

Tonight I will be at a fundraiser for the Wise County Christian Counseling office operated by Beverly Ross. The WCCC has been such a blessing since Beverly opened helping many families and individuals get through difficult situations and complex issues they face. Beverly has a gift and ability and this work is certainly a ministry field for her.

The WCCC is a non-profit organization and tonight is a night geared to raising funds to help keep the doors open. While many clients can and do pay for their sessions, others who desperately need help simply cannot pay. That's one of the wonderful things about WCCC - the ability to pay is not a criteria for getting help.

I am prayerful that tonight is a successful night in raising funds. Even more, I hope it is another night that allows more people who want and will seek help the opportunity to get it in a caring, Christ-centered environment.
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My daughter started cross-country in earnest today. I delivered her to the school at 6:30. Wow. It is an effort for her to get up that early in the morning to go run, one I empathize with a great deal. I would much rather wake up around 9:00 in the morning and the last thing I'm thinking about when I wake up is running.

I'm proud of her. We talked last night about her potential and me pushing her to always do better. I tried, maybe unsuccessfully, to explain that I believe in my heart she can do anything she is willing to work hard for. She may never be the fastest runner or have the highest grades or be President of the United States but I believe she could do those things. What I really wanted her to understand more than anything is that I am so proud of who she is, overwhelmed by her intelligence, beauty and maturity.

She is a wonderful young lady and I don't want to push her too hard but I do want to encourage her to keep achieving more. I believe in her ability to do accomplish great things. More than that, I love her for who she is today.

Surviving Day 1

Everyone came through the first day of school relatively unharmed. My daughter had one teacher who didn't make the best impression because she was a bit strict on the first day. My son couldn't believe he had a spelling test on the first day. My wife made it through without much fanfare. I guess it was a good first day.
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I was walking last night and looking at the moon and the stars. The sky was pretty and I couldn't help but think about the beauty God puts around us. Too often, I'm going way too fast to see God's beauty but last night was a reminder that I need to see it amid the stress and rush of work and life. I need to look to God for control of my life and not at myself, to allow His beauty to be seen in me, to work in me. I maintain a good facade and look like I have it under control while inside I'm a whirlwind of turmoil. I want to strive to be a part of the beautiful, peaceful scene I observed last night, one created by the Creator and one made beautiful by the Creator.

A New Start

A new school year begins today. It seems like the last one was just letting out a few days ago. The police are out in force and loads of kids have their new school clothes on today. My son's school was videotaping kids getting out of their cars and I'm sure the range of responses will be humorous. My wife started her first official day of student-teaching for what will be a 12-13 week period.

It's a new beginning for each of them and my prayer today is that it will be a good beginning and that they will walk with God in all that they do.
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My son tried out for a baseball team over the weekend and didn't get selected. I could see the disappointment all over his face when I told him the bad news yesterday. He tried hard and the coach told me it was a tight competition but in the end they picked someone they felt would meet their needs.

I wanted to tell him about the heart of my son, the joy he brings to what he loves doing, the team-player that he is, the kid who always tries to pick up the spirits of everyone else, but none of that would have changed the coaches mind. I just hated to see the look on my son's face.

I'm hoping this will push him to work on some areas he can improve because it's a good lesson. I've told him the Michael Jordan story (cut from his 9th grade basketball team but turned out to be a pretty good player) and that in life, we all have to work to get past some things at times. I hope he will be encouraged and work hard for what he wants.
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Every day is a new start.

The End Is Near (End of the Work Week That Is)

I have a job that really doesn't end on Friday but it's still a mental hurdle that I always look forward to. Even though Saturdays rarely work out the way I envision them, I look forward to them. The idea of being at home with my family is always appealing.

When I think about an upcoming Saturday, it's usually a mixed bag of thinking I will either catch up on some missed sleep or get alot of things done around the house. My Saturday usually winds up somewhere in the middle where I don't get any additional rest but don't get much done either. Still, the idea of Saturdays are always a nice reprieve from the stresses of work.
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The Rangers are frustrating. 30 runs in one game and winning a double-header only to come home and play poorly against the Mariners. I remember going to the games in April with high anticipations. Today, I can barely give my tickets away.

On the other hand, there's new life for the Cowboys and the new drama begins. What will the season hold for Romo, Owens, Phillips and Jerry? I can't help but believe it will be another rollercoaster ride that's as much soap opera as football.
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I hope you have a great weekend and that your Saturday is filled with whatever you hope for.

Old Knees and Things Easily Forgotten

My knees hurt. My wife has been incredible in setting an example and encouraging me to exercise. I appreciate her so much. I'm eating a little better, feeling a little better and getting my blood-glucose control in better condition. Along with that comes a little pain. My knees have been the culprit of late, hurting through the night causing me to wake up in discomfort. I'm giving Motrin and Tylenol some business in helping reduce the pain but it's not 100% effective. Still, I'll learn to live with a little pain when I know the overall benefits of what I'm doing.
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Last night we heard a speaker talk about being prayer warriors. One of his comments struck a chord with me because it's something we all know to be true but too easily forget. He said, "Satan knows the power of prayer better than we do." Amen, brother. I know prayer works but just like the examples he used last night, I too often pray only when I'm scared or need something. I know some of that is Satan's work, pushing me to forget to talk to God at all times because Satan knows the power of prayer.

Let it be that God's people know the power of prayer and use it as a weapon against the evil forces day-by-day, minute-by-minute.

An Update

Last week, I blogged a bit about a gentleman we have hired who made a big mistake and has paid considerably for it. Because of the nature of what he did, I was concerned about how other employees might address him working here.

Today, I am happy to say that I have been pleasantly surprised by the hearts of some people who work here. I would guess there are some negative comments or feelings but I've asked and no one has heard anything. I suppose the majority have said nothing but the few who have spoken up to me have made a lasting impression. They have had comments of thanksgiving that he would get a second chance here, questions of what they could do to help him.

The responses were opposite of what I was afraid I would hear. I thank God for the people who have spoken up and the knowledge that God is with people through the storms.

School Daze

My wife started on a mission several months ago to get her teaching certificate. She decided at some point that being able to teach would be a good alternative if and when she needed to re-enter the workforce. She breezed through some college courses she had to take. She did great through the certification classes and tests she had to take. Now, she begins the third and final leg - student teaching.

After 13 years of being a stay-at-home mom, she is up and going to work. In some ways, it is similar to what she has been doing because she doesn't get paid to student teach! We both agree that it has been a blessing that she has been able to be at home with the kids and neither of us have any idea of when or where she might actually begin a teaching career. Yet today is a day of big change.

I am pretty sure she's a little bit nervous. The next 13 weeks will be very different than the past 13 years. I know she will go through student teaching with flying colors, there's no question in my mind. She's working with a friend of ours who is a veteran teacher and will be a great mentor for her. I am a little nervous too. Change is always a little unnerving yet she is working through it with a plan to accomplish this step of her goal.

I'm praying for her. Praying that she will have peace through all of this. Praying that she will find God's will through it. Praying that she can have a good influence on the adults and kids she will come in contact with. I know she will do this well and she will touch people in the process.

Spiritual Warfare

I seem to have a focus on spiritual warfare right now and I'm not sure why. Maybe it's because I'm seeing some of the demons people are fighting. Maybe it's because of some of the demons I think I'm fighting. The one thing I do know is that there is a battle and it comes in many forms. I heard a speaker the other night mention that we might be fighting the battle against drugs, alcohol, sex, pornography...and if we aren't fighting the battle against the "big" ones that are easy to see, maybe we are fighting it against pride or something we hide better.

Today, I know this. I am a broken sinner and the only way, the only way I'm going to win the battle is with God. I have trouble laying it all at his feet. I want to be in control, suggest ways I think the outcome would work best. I haven't figured out how to turn complete control over to God - yet- but I'm working on it.

So Much To Do

It's another one of those days. So many things I need to get done but other crises around the office are taking time from what I need to accomplish. It wears me thin after awhile and I am thankful the weekend is here...even though I will now need to work through some part of it. This week has been a mental grind and when that happens, it leaves a blog with little to say. I know you are sorely disappointed...or that you are thinking it's a blog that always has so little to say. :)
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As I prepare for my first mentally exhausting battle this morning, I cannot help but think of the message I heard Wednesday night. It was about Legion, the man filled with many demons and how Jesus drove those demons away. I know today there is a spiritual battle raging around me and I am praying that Jesus will drive the demons away. With the sound of His voice, they will be gone. I know I cannot battle the demons that invade my life on my own. I need the voice of my Savior to drive them away.
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I apologize for the down note of the blog today but I know this. I have asked God to walk beside me and no matter what comes my way, there is a better future ahead of me. I may find it in hours or days or years but the one thing I know is that it is coming. Hallelujah!

Justice

The days are getting harder. Tomorrow will be a day that I can't imagine yet. We are bringing in a brother in Christ who made a bad, bad mistake and he will pay for it forever. We are giving him a chance to start proving himself but I know there will be people who will not give him a chance. I understand their fear and concern and I don't know what to expect. Will people just shun him or will they call him names, will they gossip and start rumors?

I would ask for your prayers for this situation, that this time and place will be a light, that God will be allowed to work in hearts and lives and that He will be glorified.

When You Know You Are Getting Older

As I have gotten older, I've never really felt my age. I know how many years I have been around but still think I'm 10 years younger. However, I have noticed more things recently that remind me I'm not getting younger. Knees that ache at night after exercise, a torn calf muscle, a constant pull of things to be done and looking at the university publication where my class is creeping closer to the front and there are 20 years of graduates behind me. Yikes.

Something greater than all those, for me, is the mental pull to figure out what God has in store for me. I look back on the past 40+ years and see peaks and valleys, successes and failures, rights and wrongs and I wonder what my path is to come. I wonder how God will use me, what things from my past He will use as I go through the future, what tests are yet to come my way, how will I affect the people I come in contact with. Twenty years ago I was certainly thinking more about my career, a family to come and getting the "things" I/we would want. Today, I am much more focused on how God is using me and going to use me. Much of me wants to see the script, to know ahead of time what is to come but I know that is not possible. Instead, I approach the future with a mixture of fear and wonder.

I don't know how many years I have left on earth or what is to come but I do know this; my prayer is that whatever comes my way, I serve God and His desires above my own.

Rambling

My mind is a beehive of thoughts and none of them are complete. It seems like I have hundreds of things I need to do and don't know where or how to start with some of them. Maybe I should quit blogging and get to business.
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I saw something this morning that said a study of Abraham Lincoln's face reveals one side is shorter than the other side. Is that something people are really interested in?
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School is starting soon. In some ways it will be nice to be back in a routine. On the other hand, there is the mental problem of having to be somewhere. I think the kids are somewhat excited if only because they get to see their friends on a daily basis.
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We were talking with a neighbor last night about our kids staying inside so much. As I thought about it after the conversation, I played outside a lot, rode my bike all over the place and never worried about the bad people who might harm a child. We complain because our kids stay inside but then we don't let them get out much without us because of fear. It's sad that it is that way today.
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My 13 year old as taken to the texting life with her new phone. As much as I hated to get it and still wonder what kind of trouble will come from it, being able to stay in touch with her friends is a cool thing. The best in my eyes is that she is staying in touch with a friend whose family moved to Big Spring. They are out there in the middle of nowhere (we miss you) and she and her friend can keep "talking" to each other. Good stuff.

13

On this day 13 years ago my life changed dramatically, forever, and for the better. On this day 13 years ago, my wife and I woke up early and headed to the hospital where the birth of our first child would occur. On this day 13 years ago I remember the fear and excitement I felt. Fear for safety, for what changes would occur, for what I would do as a father. Excitement for the joy in seeing the miracle of birth, for what I would learn and experience with a child. On this day 13 years ago, I held a baby girl in my hands who wrapped one of her little hands around my finger. On this day 13 years ago, I held a baby girl in my hands who became wrapped around, over, under and through my heart.

My baby girl is growing up. She's a teenager now and she is on her way to becoming more than I ever imagined for her. She is beautiful, intelligent and insightful. She likes to sleep late and leave a mess in her wake. She is a young girl growing into a beautiful woman with a lot of grace and dignity but also with fears and missteps. She is not unlike many young women of her age, wanting to make her path and yet confused at times about which way to go. On the other hand, she is unlike many young women because she is my daughter and I see the beauty in her that only a parent can see.

My baby girl loves God and I love her because of it. She inspires me and makes me want to be a better father than I have been. She is a blessing that is beyond description.

Happy Birthday little girl. You are not so little anymore but you still have my finger, and my heart, in the grip of your hand.

Struggles

I can't seem to get off the treadmill of stuff that has to be done. No matter how fast or slow I go, it just keeps coming. The weight of it all is starting to weigh me down. Right or wrong, I'm finding myself in prayer more often asking God to help me, to help me find the way. I do not like these times. I feel so lost like someone so close to the shore but not able to reach it wondering when the waves are going to overtake me. It's hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel.

I know there are many others faced with the same feeling. I don't know any way out other than taking one thing at a time and asking God for guidance. I probably make things sound worse than they are. I say that because over the weekend, at least two sets of parents nearby lost their children in a car crash. Whatever I'm feeling today can be nothing like what they are feeling today. I cannot imagine the pain and wish no one else ever would.

In the end, I know this is temporary. Something much, much greater awaits me. The topic of heaven has popped up often in the last few weeks. I taught a class on it two weeks ago. It was again the topic last night at church and has come up in some other conversations. It has been good for me and has helped me set my thoughts on things above, on greater things. I look forward to heaven and I am more ready for Jesus' return today than ever before. All of my struggles, all of my problems, all of my issues will be gone because of the majesty of God. I look forward to heaven.

It's Late

Late for me to be blogging anyway. I was out yesterday to learn about the new Texas Margin tax on businesses, an income tax that isn't called an income tax. It's crazy. As individuals we always want industry to pick up more of the tax bill but in the end, the increase flows right back to us. What we need are fewer taxes...meaning less government waste...meaning a miracle.
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I've got the Friday mentality today. I'm waiting on 5:00 so I can shut down for the weekend. Of course, the myth of shutting down mentally and physically is just that, a myth. Maybe I'll sneak in a little extra rest at some point.
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We're going to play laser tag for my nephew's birthday party Saturday night. It's a fun game and I'm looking forward to zapping everyone.
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Speaking of birthdays, my baby has one coming up next week. Last night, we took her and some of her friends to Joe T. Garcia's to eat (yes, my little angel picked it out). She finally got her cell phone that she has long wanted. She held it for a minute looking at it and we could see her hands shaking.

It was a hard decision for me to give it to her but a conversation with a friend makes it much easier. He says he enjoys texting his kids 2 or 3 times a night when they are out with friends just to remind them he's around. He says it's been a great way to stay in touch with them using their way of thinking and technology.

Happy early Bday koko.

Passing Judgment

It's interview day. I am having to replace two people in my accounting staff and am spending much time going over resumes and now bringing people in to visit about the position and their qualifications. It makes me wonder about people. I have already talked to a few. There was the sweet young lady who couldn't get along with other family members and gets her feelings hurt if someone corrects her. There was another candidate who replied to an email that included our company URL but had no idea who we were or what we did because she didn't take the time to look. Today, I will visit with 3 and maybe 4 people passing judgment on whether they are qualified to work here. It is a mentally draining process and, if no one appears as a good candidate, it will make for a long day.
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Sponsors are dropping Michael Vick like a hot potato. Innocent until proven guilty? I don't think so and I don't blame the sponsors. Vick's potential involvement is a black eye to those who have paid him to use him image. In the end, I will be most interested to see what happens to his career. It seems the American public can easily forgive an athlete who had done wrong but can produce on the playing field. I'm not so sure Vick will be welcomed back but if he is, I would suggest he be sent to Cleveland so he can play with their endzone gang known as the dog pound.
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I'm out for a tax seminar tomorrow so no blogging will occur. Have a great day!

Getting There

The theme for the class I taught Sunday morning was one that was a little difficult because it is something that I fail to do. The theme of "I Can't Wait..." caused a few ideas to pop into my head before I read through the lesson to find that the idea was "I can't wait until Jesus returns." As a Christian, that is an idea I am intellectually aware of but don't really think about very often. I'm so caught up in what needs to be done at work, mowing, vacation, school and so on that I never stop to think about Jesus' return.

While mowing on Saturday and pondering the lesson for Sunday, a recurring thought was "Be still and know that I am God." I think if I found more time to be still with God, Jesus' return would be a more central, focused thought for me. I need to find the time, I need to make the time to be still with God.

When I was going to Colorado, it was all I could think about yet I really, really want to get to heaven but I think about so many other things.

"Be still and know that I am God."

I hear you Lord.

Home Sweet Home

It's good to be home. After too many days away from my wife and my children we all came back together Saturday night (the kids were with grandparents and my wife was in lovely Abilene). It was a wonderful evening that caused me to think about how much I appreciate the 3 of them and how important they are in my life.
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The funny comment of the day Saturday came from my daughter. The kids had been at my parents and we met between here and there at a restaurant for lunch. The kids were sitting next to each other when my youngest spouted off something to his sister and her comment was, "Shhhh, we're with dad now."
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I remember my mom always saying how good it felt when she got a compliment on her child. I always assumed it was because they came so seldom, they overwhelmed her. Anyway, she was passing along compliments about our children from some of her friends and I was so proud of my kids. I suppose parents always wonder what in the world there children will do when they are off and about. My kids make me proud.
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It's good to be home.

I'll Fly Away

I made it to Las Vegas without too many problems. Our plane was a hour late leaving and I was starting to think I was in for another long, long day. Fortunately, we got going and made it here to find...rain.

After getting settled in, we (3 of my co-workers) headed to Hoover Dam and took a tour. It's fascinating to think about the sacrifices that were made and the hard, hard work it took to build the dam. The highest paid worker was making $1.25 an hour - most were around 50 cents an hour.

Now, they are building a suspension bridge that will go over the Colorado River below the dam. It's incredibly high above the river and I cannot imagine the people who are working on it now. I certainly wouldn't want to be at the top and I wondered how comfortable I would be driving over it when completed.

We begin our training seminar tomorrow - 3 intense days. I'm taking all of my savings to the casino tomorrow night and try to build a college fund for the kids. Not really. I hope to catch a show Thursday night, either the Blue Man Group or Cirque du Soleil. If anyone has recommendations, I'm all eyes.

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz...

I didn't sleep well last week and I'm feeling the effects of it today. The brain isn't churning much out (yes, I know some of you think that is the norm but it's worse than usual).

I watched the playoff of the golf tournament yesterday. It came down to the last hole of a 4 hole playoff and to the last putt. I'm not a fan of watching golf on TV but it was a good ending. Plus, there wasn't a football game, baseball game or race on.

This week will generate the talk about Barry Bonds breaking Hank Aaron's home run record. I don't know how people in baseball will handle it but based on what the talk has been so far, it won't be handled well. Will the commissioner be there? Will they finally use an asterisk in the record book? I wonder what would be happening if Barry was more media and fan friendly. Would the uproar be half as loud? For me, I think it's all about the image he has projected. He may not have hit that many home runs without steroids but others were taking them and not hitting that many so he definitely has some skill. Steroids have put a black eye on the game but the game let it happen.

Go Rangers! Will they trade Tex, Sosa, Gagne, Otsuka, Lofton? Cowboys camp starts tomorrow. Those stories should be enough to drown out the home run chase a little bit. I hope.

Here Today...Gone Tomorrow

A friend had their car broken into and some of the contents stolen yesterday. Theft is so frustrating because it comes into our secured space and takes something from us. When I lived in Ft. Worth, my truck window was smashed and contents stolen two or three times and it happened in my driveway while I was sleeping not too far away. I've known others who had their house broken into, even a deeper penetration of what we consider a safe place.

As we talked about the break in last night, I was reminded again that our stuff isn't really ours. It is, but it isn't. We have been entrusted with things but it can be taken from us in a instant. I take the dollars I work to earn and send them off to someone else for my house, my car, clothes, food, etc. Yet, a tornado could wipe away my house, a wreck could total my car, a thief could run off with all my clothes (he would need some big friends) and on and on. As much as I think my stuff is mine, it's only temporary.

Of course, I'm leading to the idea that we all have different abilities and the capability for different responsibilities and all of our efforts need to focus on the Creator and Giver of life itself. The only thing, the one, single thing we have is a gift in the form of His son, a Savior who has presented us with the only thing we really need. The cars and money and houses and stereos and everything else will be lost from us at some point but there is one thing we have been given that lasts. Yes, we can lose the gift Jesus gave us by ignoring it and turning away from it but if we will grasp it, hold it, cherish it, use it...it is ours to keep.

Amazing Grace

It's my favorite song. Many years ago I just loved to sing it. I remember it being one of the main songs I used when rocking my babies to sleep. As I have come to know grace, to feel it and understand it, the song remains my favorite. Before leaving for vacation, I went on iTunes and did a search for Amazing Grace. There were hundreds of versions by various signers and I started downloading. I think I have 11 or so different singers and versions of it. Ruben Studdard (one of the American Idol contestants) does a great version. Chris Tomlin and Jars of Clay both encapsulate the song with different arrangements that are beautiful. Willie Nelson lends his country touch and Bob Seeger and Arlo Guthrie really get folksy with the tune. The Dropkick Murphys put a rocking rendition together that is like nothing I've heard before.

My favorite by far are the Royal Scottish Dragoons. I'm not sure what Dragoons are but they play a mean bagpipe. I've told my wife when I have a funeral that I don't want much but I do hope she can find someone to play Amazing Grace with bagpipes.

It is such a blessing when we can recognize grace. I don't think I did for many years but I feel it in waves today. I've heard people say that those who have sunk the deepest may understand grace the most. I don't know if it's true or not but believe there have been times I've sunk deeper than I ever want to go again and I am confident that grace rescued me.

I'm so thankful for the grace of God. I pray I will never take it for granted, that I will rejoice in the healing power of it and that I will give it freely, as freely as God shares it with me.

The Week After

The week after a vacation always seems brutal to me. It seems I can be gone for a week but there is 4 weeks of work needing to be done. Yikes.

Next week, I head out for Sin City with 4 other employees to a seminar. It's one place I do not look forward to visiting. The crowds, the noise, the endless lights. Fortunately, we are actually going to be in another town nearby away from the Strip. I do plan to make another trip to Hoover Dam. I've been once and it is an incredible site. The lake is beautiful and the drive is scenic.

Last night I took in the new Harry Potter movie with my family. I certainly didn't understand all of it and the kids were a bit disappointed because of changes from the book (I haven't read the stories). Even still, it was an entertaining movie with special effects at every turn. I'm sure the costume and makeup folks have a blast during these movies.

Pain and suffering are on my mind this morning. I read a poem a father wrote about the son he lost this morning and it makes me hurt for him. I wonder about His relationship with God. I read the questions he has but can't imagine the pain and feeling that lie with those questions. I know so many others are feeling the same suffering and wondering where God is, what He is thinking. I think of the song "Blessed Be Your Name" and know I haven't walked through the depths of suffering so many others have. I pray that those who suffer will continue to seek God and in time, their suffering will be lessened. I don't know if it's possible because I haven't experienced the excruciating pain they feel, but I do hope for them. I do hope.

I Saw God

I love my vacation time in Colorado. It is a special time that gives me so many blessings.

I saw God in the peace of the river and the majesty of the mountains. I saw God in the power of a hail storm and the beauty of the sun setting over the mountains. I saw God in the quiet moments while listening to the sound of nature as well as in the noise of children playing and having fun. I saw God in the worship service on Sunday and in time spent in prayer.

I may be guilty of talking too much about the joy that abounds in the fishing and weather of my vacation and never really mentioning that one of the great joys is seeing the handiwork of my Creator. I love my vacation for so many reasons, one of the primary ones being that I slow down and see God.

I pray today that I will slow down and see God in Decatur as clearly as I did in South Fork. I pray that I will slow down so that others might see God through my actions. That's one of the wonderful things about vacation, time to reflect and contemplate how to be a better Christian today than I was yesterday and how to glorify God more tomorrow than today.

Last week, I saw God, saw His power and His majesty and reflected on His amazing grace. I saw God and I know I will be stronger in the days ahead because of my time with Him.

Freedom

I watched Braveheart last week where Mel Gibson's character, William Wallace, leads a group of Scotsmen in their quest for freedom from England.

I spent the weekend hearing my son say how cool it would have been to be a part of the signing of the Declaration of Independence and talk about his desire to visit Boston and Philadelphia to see historical sites and learn more about our freedom.

I taught a class Sunday morning on freedom - the freedom we have through Christ - the freedom from sin and Satan that we have been given.

Each of these freedoms came with a price, namely the loss of life. Braveheart gave me a good feeling for a few minutes after seeing it. Our country's independence is a wonderful gift that will last a lifetime. My freedom from sin is a treasure greater than anything, a sacrifice, a gift that will last through eternity.
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Today's the day. My lovely wife and little angel should be leaving Searcy, Arkansas soon and this afternoon we will head north/northwest. I am E-X-C-I-T-E-D, excited. It's been nice to have some time with my son at home while the girls are gone but I sure miss my girls and I am ready to see them. I've been ready to leave for Colorado but much, much more ready to see two beautiful women. It's a great day.

Bang. Bang-bang-bang.

July 4th always means fireworks but this year, July 1st, 2nd and 3rd have meant fireworks around our house. I think I'm going deaf.

My son and I are headed to the Fort Worth Cats game tonight with some friends. The Cats have always done a BIG fireworks show, one that I think rivals or surpasses the Rangers show. It will be fun if the rain holds off. Plus, I get a Kinkaid's burger at the game. That's living.

I'm mentally somewhere in New Mexico now. I'm trying to remember the things I need to do today so I can write them down but I'm struggling to get it on paper so I will remember it. I can't wait. Fun Valley has to be one of my top 2 or 3 favorite places. I relax there. I focus there. I fish there. I take in God's majesty and power there.

In case you can't tell, I'm ready to be there.

The Pre-Vacation Crunch

Why do so many things come up the week I'm trying to leave for vacation? I hope for a somewhat peaceful week (you'd think I would learn) and then - WHAMMO - a thousand little things come up. The good part is that I'm going on vacation. I'm leaving in 4 days. 4 days! Mentally, I'm halfway to Colorado which doesn't help me get things done at the office.
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All of our "regular" preachers were out of town yesterday so one of our Elders spoke to us in the worship service. He did a really good job and it was good to hear from one of our leaders. I certainly appreciate those men.
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What's up with the Rangers? They are playing some pretty good baseball right now. Kam Loe is smoking and Marlon Byrd has come out of nowhere to make some great plays and provide a lot of offense for the team. It seems a bit late for a run and I certainly don't believe it will last at this point but it's fun to see. All this while Blalock and Tex are on the DL. Hmmmm.
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Did I mention it was only 4 days until I leave for vacation. :)

Hang 'em High

Hopefully this is my last meeting as a Grand Juror. One last day of listening to stories of the dregs of Wise County.
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I saw the oddest sight yesterday. A bright orb in the sky shining light on me. I was puzzled but someone told me it was called "the sun." It was fascinating.
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7 DAYS. 1 WEEK LEFT. Next Thursday I'm headed to lovely Colorado, to what might be my favorite place on earth. 7 days of relative peace, fishing, mini-golf, total relaxation. I will enjoy each day.

The Speed of Life

I've got so many things to do and it doesn't seem there is time to hold it all. One might ask why I would stop to write this if I'm running short on time and I would have to agree it's a good question. It's also a good time for me to take inventory and try to turn what seems to be a mess into a manageable workload.

I struggle to get off the wheel, to quit trying to run faster and to start running smarter. I need to take time to build more relationships and strengthen the relationships I have. I need to hear people better and find out what is going on in others' lives.

I can't control life but I can control my response to what happens. I will work on that today and see how tomorrow goes.

Looks Like...Rain

Did we really pack up a town and move it somewhere close to Seattle? I heard about houses flooding in Granbury overnight and wonder when it will let up. I hope no one else is hurt or killed because of the high water.
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A single digit is really helping me think about something other than the rain. The digit is 9 today and it is the number of days left before I leave for Colorado. I am so ready to breathe mountain air, take a walk with my wife surrounded by mountains, play mini-golf with the kids and feel the first trout on the end of my line. I'm ready for a burger and a malt at the cook shack and pizza in Creede. I'm ready to see some of God's most wonderful (in my estimation) creation. 9 days.
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9 days. I think I'm already getting "short-timer's syndrome." It's going to be hard to think about much more than vacation for the next few days.

And The Rain Came Down...

In case you didn't notice, it rained a wee bit yesterday. I got home yesterday afternoon and thought I had bought lakefront property. Water was almost everywhere, rushing down the creek, coming over the road, dropping from the sky. It was about a foot from our front door as we helplessly watched. After several prayers, the rain let up and the water drained off pretty well.

There is more rain in the forecast today and tomorrow. I'm not sure how much more we can take. So many people have had to endure flooding recently and while I appreciate the rain we've had, we really need a break. I will be in prayer all day that what rain we get is manageable rain and that no one has to endure more trouble because of the water.

I'm praying for protection for everyone today. I'm praying that even though our possessions are really nothing, meaningless in the picture of eternity, that God will still protect us from damage and harm.

Finished. Done. Kaput.

Yes, baseball season for my young Roger Clemens/Albert Pujols is over. We wrapped up with a tournament in Lancaster this past weekend where we came out on the losing end overall but played some of our best ball of the year. The best part for me was seeing my son have a really, really good tournament defensively (playing 2nd and pitching) and offensively. It's fun to watch him and see the improvement game after game, year after year. It's what he enjoys and he makes baseball fun.

My daughter is thrilled baseball season is over. She, on the other hand, gets up at 6:00 three days a week to work out with the cross country team. Other than getting up early, I think she really enjoys it and I really enjoy watching her run. I go with her on the 3 days and walk the track while she and the other girls stretch, jog and get ready for their run. I appreciate their dedication to being as good as they can be and I am proud of my angel for working as hard as she does.
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In the past, I have been a current events fanatic - always watching the news shows, reading papers and current event magazines, interested in politics and world events. I'm not that way anymore. I don't watch the news every night, I don't go get a paper everyday, I don't peruse the Internet to keep up with what's happening. I think two things have come together to change my focus. One, we seem busier as a family. Two, I spend more time thinking about things more eternal in nature. I spend more time finding myself in thought about God and in prayer. Now, I don't spend near as much time doing those things as I should but I hope to keep getting better.

There's really nothing to that comment other than a personal observation and, after thinking about what I wrote, I'm certainly not patting myself on the back. I only say it because I was thinking this morning that as each day passes, I want to be closer to God. I look back at my life lived so far and see how off-course I have been so often. I want to be on-course from this day forward. I know their will be struggles but I want to hunger and thirst for God. I ask that you will pray for me that I may stay on that journey and be focused on my Creator and Savior.

Sun or Rain?

Will it be sunny? Is it going to rain? Last night, the weatherman said the computer models were all in agreement for a big rain event next week. That makes me think it will either snow 8 inches or it will be 122 degrees.
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It's Family Fun Night at church tonight for families involved in the youth group. I don't know what to expect (other than fun, of course) but I'm looking forward to going.
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My son got Guitar Hero for his birthday. He seems to love it and I think he's spending a great deal of time playing right now. I hope I haven't created a monster and walk in one day to find him with hair down his back, tattoos covering one arm and part of the other and earrings coming out of his eyelids.
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Kobe Bryant is wearing me out with his trade demands. What team wants a self-indulgent, over-inflated ego, all about me player on their team? Unfortunately, because he can put the ball in the hoop, there will be plenty of suitors.

While the Spurs are boring, I appreciate their work ethic and the fact that we don't see their mug shots or hear their whining.
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Enjoy your weekend. We'll be having family fun tonight and baseball tomorrow.

Walking in the Valley

I've been keeping up with the Tod Brown family by a blog they have set up. Tod describes some of his struggles in understanding why his son lost his life in a car wreck a few weeks ago and his words, his emotions that come through, make me think, wonder, what that family is going through. I appreciate his willingness to share their moments of happiness and times of questioning because I don't understand either. Why would God let a 13 year old who seemed to bring so much to so many die? I cannot comprehend it but also understand I never will...at least in this life.

I do know this. I will go home today and hug my wife and my children and be thankful for the time I have with them. I cherish each day with them...I just need to keep doing a better job letting them know that I cherish them.

A Swing And A Miss

I took my son and a friend to the Ranger game last night for their birthdays where they got their names up on the Coca-Cola board in center field. I'm ever amazed at children. I paid for pretty nice seats behind the Cubs dugout but the boys were happier when we went to sit on the top row of the stadium. I must say I did enjoy the breeze.

Sammy Sosa is swinging away for home run number 600. It seemed apparent last night that he was wanting to hit it against his old team. He was swinging away and struck out his first 3 times at bat. On his final at-bat of the night, he hit a fly ball to centerfield. There was a moment of collective gasp as people hoped it was going out but we saw no history unfolding as the outfielder caught it.

My son and friend went down before the game to try and get autographs. There was a young lady standing next to them wanting autographs also. The boys came back up after awhile because the young lady and a friend nearby used a lot of profanity and the boys got tired of that. I am proud of both of them for their desire to be somewhere out of earshot of that type of talk. My son also informed me, as we left the stadium, that the girl was offering to take off her shirt to get it signed and that "he sure didn't want to see that." He cracks me up.

A Little Less Muggy Please

I could use a little less humidity. I'm thankful for the rain but the humidity combined with any temperature over 70 makes me "perspire."
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It was a party-party weekend for us. My wife's birthday was last Friday, Father's Day over the weekend and my son's birthday is Wednesday. Add in a nephew and brother-in-law birthday and we rolled it into one big event last Friday night. Woohoo! Great food, great family and friends, a great time.
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I'm headed to the Cubs-Rangers game today. It will be fun seeing the Cubs play live (which would only be topped by seeing them at Wrigley) and waiting to see if Pinella blows a gasket of if Sammy hits number 600.

Have a great day.

Open or Closed?

I heard a great message last night about the church helping the hurting to heal. It was a challenge to each of us as the church to care for our hurting brothers and sisters, to love them through hard times even when those hard times shake our own foundation. He told a sobering story about an experience that had happened at the church he attends and how, while suffering a great deal of pain, the church was strengthened through their collective effort to give comfort and support to those most immediately hurt. I have seen it happen in my own congregation and know the power of working together to heal wounds.

The other side of the equation is for someone to be willing to be open about their struggle. That person needs to feel safe. They need to feel trust. They need to feel love.

All of those - safety, trust, love - we have with God but we seldom have with other people. We need to make sure as the body of Christ, we offer that, or more than offer, we resonate safety and trust and love. When we do, when we resonate those things, people will be open, they will seek shelter in God and healing can begin.

I want to resonate safety and trust and love. I want be there for people who are hurting, who are wounded, who need to heal. I do not think it's easy but I do know the grace of God, I have experienced it, felt it, live it and because of that, I want others to know it too.

Prices Going Up

I heard on the news Tuesday night that the price of coffee beans will be going up. Does that mean more people will be sleepy all day long?
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Did you know you needed to keep certain kinds of produce away from each other? For instance, apples are a gas-releaser and tomatoes are a gas-absorber. Keeping them together will make one or both go bad quicker. Fascinating.
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Are you a conservative or liberal? It remains a question that makes me laugh when I think about it. Of course, you are liberal if you are to the left (why the left?) of me and you are a conservative if you are to the right of me. So, unless you agree with me, you may be liberal or you may be conservative. I wonder why we can't just all get along. All it takes is everyone agreeing with me!
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Yes, I heard the combined gasp that just came from all of you after reading my last sentence.
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One more day until I'm the laser tag champion of the world. Yipeeeeeee.

Yowee...It's Hot

We were playing baseball in Sanger on Saturday and I thought I was melting. Man, was it hot and steamy. When we arrived, the mosquitos were thick and the city sent a truck out to spray. Then the humidity really kicked in as the sun came up. I'm ready for fall!
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Were you as interested in Paris Hilton's comings-and-goings from jail as I was? I'm somewhere between apathetic and disgusted about the amount of attention that is paid to her "story." Same goes for that other lady that overdosed not to long ago. I feel sorry for her baby girl but I'm so disinterested in the reporting about her that I can't remember her name.
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My son through out a question on Sunday that left me thinking. "Dad, who are our allies?" Can you name them? We went through a number of countries but there were some I didn't know how to classify. All the while, I'm amazed that a 10 year old comes up with that type of question.

A few weeks ago, I was carting a friend of my son home from a birthday party. We were talking about careers and he stated he was going to Harvard. There was no "I hope" or "I would like to", just "I'm going."

Much better stuff than Paris and the other junk I hear too much about.
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We've got a laser tag birthday party coming up later this week. I can't wait. Last year was paintball and I'd love to be doing that again (it seems that me against 11 year olds is more fair than me against old competition) but laser tag is in doors with air conditioning. I think I love laser tag now!
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Stay cool.

I Want My Baby Back

Our youngest returns from church camp today and both mom and dad are looking forward to seeing him. We have seen a couple of pictures of him at camp and based on the fact that he was standing in a murky creek with a smile on his face indicates to me he was right where he wanted to be. I am looking forward to hearing his stories.

I have missed him but his mom is hurting for him. I wonder if most families are like ours. When our children are gone for a few days, I miss them and am happy when they return but I get the feeling my wife almost hurts physically awaiting their return. I know we both love our children deeply. I am already telling my oldest the virtues of attending the local community college so she will not go off far. Yet when they are gone, it seems my wife and I look forward to their return in the same but different ways.

God was so good when He designed parents. We have different roles and we provide different things for our children. I marvel at my wife and all that she does for her family but particularly I take joy in seeing her care for our children.

I cannot understand why people abuse kids and I cannot fathom the idea of same-sex parenting. I grew up in a home that was nurturing as did my wife. We are trying to provide the same environment for our children, to lift them up, to encourage them, to help them, to prepare them. I am thankful that the people we have as friends are the same, that are families are incredibly important and that the health and well-being of the family is one of our highest priorities.

In the end, I do know this. Both my wife and I look forward to the return of their baby today.

Too Busy To Blog

It's summer and vacation time. Where are you going?

Our plan is another trip to Colorado later in the summer and maybe a few short trips sprinkled around. My son is at church camp this week and my daughter goes to a church camp in July. The kids want to go to Schlitterbaun (don't count off for bad spelling) and I want to see the Bush Presidential Library.
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I heard a great message last night on the lies that Christians believe. The point was that Satan wants to get the church believing things that really aren't true so that he can destroy the church. When you hear some of the lies brought to lie, it's silly that we would ever buy-in to them yet we do at times. I hope each one of us will only buy-in to the only story that is real, the one of our Savior.
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I'm on the road today - it seems I'm on the road waaaayyyyyyyyy too often these days - visiting stores and bringing joy and good cheer to those I see.

Have a great day!

Boats for Sale?

I have wondered what it would be like to live on the coast. I feel like I'm getting a better idea of late while I watch the water flooding through my yard and the question of whether I need a boat to paddle out of the driveway drifts through my head.
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I taught the high school class Sunday morning discussing the topic of hypocrisy. I couldn't help but think of things in my own life that I say and then do something differently. It's agonizing to think about.

As part of the my preparation, I went to dictionary.com for the definition of hypocrisy. Interesting, the Unabridged Dictionary stated the definition as a pretense of having virtous character, moral or religious beliefs that one does not truly possess. Wow! I didn't know only people who put on a show of upstanding character could be hypocrites. I scrolled down the page to find the American Heritage definition stated as the practice of professing beliefs, feelings or virtues that one does not possess.

I don't know that the definitions mattered because we were discussing hypocrisy from the viewpoint of calling ourselves Christian but leading a life that is different from the example of Christ. It left me with a great deal of needed self-examination that still carries forward today.
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I find a lot of negative things to point out in my blog. Those are easy to rant and rave about. So, to find something good today, I look no further than the high school class I taught yesterday. 18 really, really neat kids. 18 nice kids. 18 kids who appear to be sincere in their faith. 18 kids who are grappling with choices and decisions they are and will make. Spending time with them, I am encouraged that they are 18 kids who will make good decisions and will be good leaders in their own ways. 18 kids who make me smile.

The Other Side of the Coin

Tod and LeeAnn (Bailey) Brown were classmates of mine at college. This past week, they were in a terrible accident that took the life of their 13 year old son and has their daughter going through several surgeries to repair damage to her legs. It is heartbreaking and I cannot begin to imagine their pain.

Tod and LeeAnn are incredible people who have a deep and strong committment to God and faith in Him. It was evident when we were in school and it is evident today. A web site has been set up to keep people posted on what is happening with their family and it includes a guestbook where people have left notes. The sheer volume of notes to the family speaks volumes about the impact they have had on the lives of others but the notes themselves show how deeply this family went with so many. When I think about the loss of their son, I cannot comprehend what feelings they might have but I think I can comprehend what their son experienced, the environment he was raised in and the faith I am confident he had in his Father. In my idea of Heaven, I think the young boy is sitting with God today telling Him about the wonderful parents he had on earth.

I hurt for the Browns and hope they will come through this as best they can. I feel certain that their faith and hold onto God will do that. I can only imagine the pain of their loss will never go away but they will also see the other side of the tragedy, that their son is now with God.

Cindy Sheehan

Most of us know Ms. Sheehan because of her anti-war protests outside of President Bush's Crawford home. She has been on TV, pictured with Hugo Chavez, praised and villified. I am one who has thought of her in a negative light but her letter/blog that she was giving up the anti-war movement made her sound human and made me pause to think.

I cannot say anything against her bitterness over her son's death. I cannot pretend to know the horror I would feel if it were one of my children. While her crusade led her down some paths that seemed bizarre at times, I want to believe the motivation for it was due to the loss she suffered. Yet, as her "fame" rose, her personal relationships seemed to fall apart. Her husband divorced her and it seems she has other children that were left behind in the wake of her effort.
Now, she seems a sad and broken woman. One of her comments, that the American people are more concerned with the next American Idol than the loss of life in a war, doesn't sound to off-base at times. Her realization that she has failed important relationships in her life isn't too unlike many people we come in contact with every day.

I am here to say that I am not so unlike Ms. Sheehan. I often see what needs to be more important in other's lives while falling short of doing what is best in mine. My hope for her is that she can go and repair some of her broken relationships (which is why she said she is giving up the protest), that the damage left behind her can be fixed all the while hoping that as a country, we will all be more focused on what is truly important. I know that is what I want to do.

Memorial Day

It's a great day but also a sad day. It's a day we honor our fallen military men and women, people who have sacrificed their lives to allow us to maintain our freedom. There are so many thoughts on wars fought, both today and throughout history, but one thing remains constant. In all of these battles, there have been people willing to put themselves on the line for me, my children, my children's children and on.

Because I have not been in the military or a situation where my life was on the line, I do not think I can begin to understand the courage and bravery our military people exhibit. I am so thankful for them and the fact that they have the courage and bravery to fight wars for us.

I am thankful for all of the men and women who have served in the armed forces. Today, I am focused on those who fought and died defending me and the people I love, defending you and your loved ones - those who paid with their lives so I can enjoy mine. I hope we, as a country, will continue to honor these unseen heroes for all they gave.

Hard Stuff

Yesterday was a hard day for me. I had to listen to stories of a murder, child abuse and drug use. I was overwhelmed with the hurt and pain being experienced in Wise County. I went through emotions of sadness and anger. I listened as people were referred to as "frequent-fliers" because of the number of times they had been through the penal system. I struggled with my thoughts as I heard these stories and thought many of these people needed to be removed from this life because of their sins. I struggled to find any compassion for such heinous acts.

I still struggle today. I want to have the compassion of Christ but it is so hard to do when you hear about children who are taken advantage of by relatives and supposed friends. It's so easy for me to think that death is all they deserve and so hard to wonder how God could ever find mercy for them.

I know this will continue to weigh me down while I think of the images and descriptions I sat through yesterday. The only comfort I find, the only peace I can reach for, the only hope I can imagine is in the knowledge that God is so much bigger than me...so loving, so compassionate, so merciful. I hurt for these children and families and all I can offer is my prayer that they will find God through this, they will seek Him and find the hope only He can offer. I too want to learn that lesson and seek Him instead of giving in to the one who wants to turn us away from God.

I pray that God makes the hard easier to bear, that He soften hearts and strengthen resolve to overcome the tragedies we face. Only God can do that, if we let Him.

Ultimate Authority

I've been hooked on "24" this year. It's probably not a great show to watch but plays to one of my alter egos I suppose. If you've been watching, you might have caught a line from the season finale that made my ears perk up. Powers Boothe has been playing the power-hungry Vice President who has stepped in while the President was incapacitated due to an injury from a bomb. The Vice President has made several decisions which turned out not to be the right decision and after a bit of reflection, tells his Chief of Staff (I'm paraphrasing) "you think you have all the answers when someone else is making the decisions but when you have the ultimate authority, you find out the answers are much tougher to come by."

I read editorials in the paper, I hear employees talking about their work place, members of a church criticizing decisions that are made...you know the deal. Everyone has the right answer but few have or want to be the person who has to make those decisions. Being an analyst is much easier than being a leader because the analyst doesn't have much skin in the game.

Leaders are special people. Good leaders handle praise and criticism equally well, never getting too high on themselves or too low on others. The realize that most people don't want the ultimate authority, don't want to put their head on the line and remain willing to make their best effort to make the right decision.

I'm thankful for leaders who are willing to do their best, whether I always agree with them or not.

The Power of Forgiveness

I overhead a conversation between two employees this morning where one had been hurt by something someone had said to her. Her response was to ignore the one who hurt her and give them the cold shoulder. The other suggested she talk through it with the 3rd party and that was about all I heard.

The conversation has again reminded me of the power of forgiveness. The strength received from being forgiven is awesome. The strength gained in forgiving builds giants. I've been forgiven enough in my life by people that I've hurt that I understand how it helps me, lifts me up, gives me strength and courage to improve my life. Those that have forgiven me reach new heights of respect and awe from me. They are the strongest of the strong to overcome whatever hurt I may have sent their way.

Having forgiven others, I too know the power that comes from that. Not a power to lord it over anyone but a power to overcome the greatest of obstacles I may face. The power to know that whatever hurt I feel, whatever wrong I experience, I can overcome it, I can become bigger than the pain.

Imagine our God, a God who forgives time and time again. I know the strength I gain from His forgiveness. I know that each time He forgives me, I am better equipped to overcome Satan's next attack on me.

Imagine our God, a God who forgives time and time again. My concept to know His strength from His willingness to forgive is like a grain of sand on the beach. He forgives so much from so many. I'm confident He knew it would be this way when he gave his Son. To say he is a giant among giants does injustice to the reverence and awe I have for Him.

I do know this. I am blessed to receive forgiveness when I do. Even more, I want to be like my God in granting forgiveness. I want to know the power that comes from His mercy if only to use it to fight again the power of darkness that would threaten us.

If someone has hurt you that you haven't forgiven, today could be the day that you let it all go, that you overcome hurt with strength, that you lift someone up and become a giant in their life.

Thanks be to God for showing us, each day, the power of forgiveness.

Wikipedia How To's

Wikipedia has a how to section that shows up on my Google homepage. There are some good how-to's, some that are useless and some that just make me think. Today was the Wikihow titled "How To Avoid An Uncomfortable Religious Conversation." I couldn't help myself and clicked over to see some simple ways to redirect the conversation. Nothing too controversial I suppose but it would have been much easier to just put one, "Join A Church and Wait."

Now, I realize I'm brushing a broad stroke when I say that far too often "religious" people are happy just being religious. They internalize their religion, they can pick apart those who aren't as religious, they drive to church giving funny looks to those who aren't headed to church and think that those people should be in church instead of doing whatever they are doing, they are pacified by following the same rituals each week at church and they leave only to come back and do it all again a week later.

They actually has been me at times, I just don't want to point the finger at myself. Goodness gracious, I hope that instead of avoiding uncomfortable religious conversations that I find myself very comfortable sharing the Good News, that talking about what Jesus has done for me is never uncomfortable and that I never make it uncomfortable for anyone else. I want to reflect a joy that makes other inquisitive so that I can help them find comfort in knowing the God of love and mercy that loves them and wants them in a relationship with Him. I hope I can make that a comfortable conversation.

How's Your Bass

No, not your fish. I'm talking about the bass notes that are emitted from tiny cars, a sound so deep and resonating you would think the car must be bouncing down the road. I was in a car audio shop recently and a young kid had his car in to fix his subwoofers. Once they did, they cranked it up and the windows of the store were vibrating, the metal around the windows rattling. Being 15 feet away, you could feel the vibrations coming from this small little car. Amazing. This guy paid who knows how many dollars to make his car vibrate and there are thousands of others just like him. I'm guilty too. I'll invest in a good stereo because I love to hear the music full and clear (although I have nothing to compare with the little cars with BIG speakers). I'll spend money and time so the music will resonate through my truck yet do I spend the time to make sure the Word of God resonates from me? It doesn't take money, just time, but I have to ask myself if I'm willing to spend it.

What message could we ever hear or tell that makes the glass vibrate and the metal rattle more than the saving grace of God? Even more, what message can reach the heart and soul more than the message of God's overwhelming love?

Last night I spoke about purity. I hope I got half the message across that I was thinking about, that I was feeling stirring inside me. I can't manage to be pure on my own but my God can cleanse me, He can make me spotless, blameless...perfect. That's a message that has more power, more reasonance, than anything else we could ever hear.

Purity

I received a very big challenge yesterday. It started out as a simple question, Jacob asking me to address our youth group about purity. I have been a part of our youth class on Wednesday nights, speaking to the group a few times but mostly watching and learning about our youth. Overall they are an impressive group from what I see. (As a sidenote, I would say they are good kids with good parents AND good involvement from Jacob and Heather - great examples.)

The simple question is something I have been wrestling with since be asked to teach. Purity? Me? Far too often I feel so filthy, so far from purity. I have far too many "from experience" stories on what our kids shouldn't do. It seems like it gets harder and harder for me to talk about what people should do when I find myself doing the opposite. Purity seems elusive for me much of the time because I let Satan exploit my weaknesses. My mind isn't on things of God but things of me. I find myself asking for forgiveness too often.

I feel a closeness to God's servant, David, when I read the 51st Psalm. A man after God's own heart yet feeling many of the same things I feel. I echo his plea, "create in me a pure heart, O God..."

I almost tremble at the thought of what purity means for me as a Christian. It scares me to think what the lack of purity in my life means.

I would ask for your prayers for our youth, that they will seek the Light and seek to live pure lives. I would ask for your prayers for me, that God will use me to share His message about purity to them. My prayer is that you and I will seek God, to seek purity in our lives in order to walk closer to Him, to seek the unfailing, perfect love that He gives and thank Him for the forgiveness He sheds on us.

The Wall

Our preacher recently wrote a blog about not writing a blog (www.rross.blogspot.com). He cited some reasons why he might quit writing a daily blog that was met with a number of counterpoints by his daily readers. I've come to appreciate his thoughts over the last couple of weeks and think it's time for a blogger vacation for me.

When I started, I was only writing for myself, a place for a journal that was easy to find and keep up with. Over time, several people found my blog and have read it off and on. I've been surprised by some of those who have commented to me about something they read here. Most of the comments have been positive and I appreciate them. There may be others of you who look at this blog like a bad wreck. You can't help but look at the carnage hoping for a glimpse of something positive.

It does get hard to write something each day, especially when the thought of what to write turns to thinking of what someone will want to read. When I was just writing for myself, it was easy thinking I was the only one who would read some of my crazy thoughts. Once I knew other people were coming here, I felt a responsibility to try and write something they would enjoy.

To stop the rambling, I'll be more concise and simply say I'm going to take a few days off. I have so much going on right now that the brain seems more like oatmeal than something that should be churning out understandable thoughts. I'll probably try to post something next Tuesday or Wednesday and see how the head is before deciding whether to push on or give up for awhile.

Until then, have a great weekend, enjoy your Sonic coney if you are so inclined and stay dry.

Storms of Life

The storm that blew through yesterday did a little damage and moved on. 14 phones and maybe as many computers were ruined yesterday by a lightning strike. Hours of lost time and lost money replacing equipment for something that lasted just a few minutes. Wow.

I think my life has too often been like a storm. In just a few minutes I can do a lot of damage to people I love, to friends, to people I really don't know. I am disappointed by my example to them and saddened by the hurt I cause. My temper and my tongue have too often been a storm, short-lived but leaving a trail of damage in it's path. I want to take it all back, I want a do-over but there is no such thing. I hurt for the people I've hurt. Even more, I hurt for the un-Christian example I have been. It's not who I want to be.

My prayer today is that God will help me leash my tongue and my temper, that I will be more thoughtful of others and less inclined to think of myself. I pray that those I hurt will find healing and will forgive me. I pray that my heart will be broken, that my will and the evil, hurtful things I do will be replaced by the love of God and from this day forward that is what people see and hear coming from me.

A Noisy Morning

A storm rolled through Decatur and thunder and lightning sounded like it was on top of my head. We've lost power in one of our buildings at work and a couple of computers seem to have been fried. A fun day. The phone system is out too so it will be quite for awhile. I was positive the Channel 8 weatherman said the "Mexico Cap" was on top of us and it was possible but not likely that we would get big storms. Lesson learned: listen to my wife next time.
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For those of you who wanted to light the candle, gas lamp or wood stove first you are out of luck. You have the light the match first.
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So Roger Clemens is going to be a Yankee again. Old age must be getting to him or maybe he's just wanting to go into the HOF as a Yankee but it would have been fun to see him in a Rangers uniform for one last go-round.
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Stay dry and warm today.

Can You Spell C-H-O-K-E?

One of the ugliest performances in pro basketball ended last night. The Mavs stunk it up from game 1 and it never got much better. Blow out losses and tight wins - that's no way for a team that is supposed to win the championship to play. Oh yeah, the MVP candidate spent a good part of the 4th quarter, crunch time, on the bench because he was adding nothing to the team. Dirk's no MVP yet - a very good player yes, but no MVP. MVP's don't shrivel up at the big moments.
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It's GREAT to be home even though I didn't get much sleep last night. Just being in my bed for a little while was a great treat but the best thing about being home is being with my wife and children. Nothing feels better than having them near me.
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You have a candle, gas lamp and wood stove. You have one match. Which one will you light first?

In The Dark

A strong storm blew through town Wednesday night. It's not much fun sitting in a hotel in the dark while the power is out. The lightning provided some light and the lights were back on after a short amount of time. Tomorrow I'm headed for lovely Decatur. I can't wait.
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I've been interviewing several people for sales positions while I'm here. I enjoy interviewing because you can meet some very, very interesting people. There aren't many things I hear that shock me but people do continue to surprise me over and over. I suppose I expect people to be on their best behavior but when a woman I'm interviewing throws out a few cuss words during the interview...I am surprised. I want to say "what are you thinking?" but I just start winding down the interview instead.
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Do you have any fun, wild or wierd co-employee stories?

I Slept...I Think

It's rainy and windy in Salado and the first night away, always hard, was filled with intermittent sleep. How about more "poor me?"
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Today starts a new era for some of our employees. A new manager for the store brings some excitement, some trepidation. Change does that to almost everyone and the next few days will be interesting watching how the people here handle change.

It's so easy to get into a comfort zone. I do it all the time even though I think of myself as someone who looks for and is open to change. I realize change will come and know it is best to be prepared and stay on top of it so I can have some effect on it yet I am comfortable being comfortable.

I battle the issue with my faith. I tell myself to rely on God, to turn my problems over to Him, to trust Him but it is hard to do at times. I need to change, to be more trusting, to be more open, to truly put God first. It shouldn't be a struggle but it is only because it causes me to change.

I will begin today making every effort to turn my eyes to God, to see Him and follow Him, to trust Him and seek Him.

On The Road Again

I'm starting to feel like Willie Nelson...without the hair, voice, ability to play guitar, or marijuana. I am headed out again to spend some time in one of our stores with a new Store Manager. A few nights in a motel, some fast food meals, lots of coffee while driving and I'll be more than a little ready to be back home. I'm already wishing I was back and I still have to swing by the house to get my luggage.

After several days of attempted travel/actually going somewhere, I'm just a little too familiar with my suitcase.
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Someone mentioned the NBA playoffs have started. I haven't noticed.
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Scott Verplank won the Byron Nelson. For a tournament too short on the big names, it's neat to see a local guy win the prize.
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Now for real sports. The Yankees are coming to town. It's amazing to me to go watch a Rangers - Yankees game because it's hard to tell which team has more fans in the seats. It's loud. I was at a game last year and A-Rod was booed unmercifully each time at the plate. Then, between innings when they were doing the Kiss-cam on the big screen (they pan around the crowds finding husband/wife or boyfriend/girlfriend trying to get them to kiss each other while the crowd cheers or boos depending on the kiss) they showed A-Rod in the dugout next to one of his teammates. He finally noticed, grabbed the teammate next to him and kissed him on top of the head which brought a big round of cheers. A good sport about it all and then he comes to bat and gets booed again. It's tough making lots of money.
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I hope I get in tonight in time to see 24. The story is getting a bit goofy but I'm still enticed to watch just to see what will happen to the hardest working man in the world.
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To my children, if you are reading this, be nice to you mom and help her while I'm gone.