Knowing God

I was in a great class last night discussing how to know God. I have long had an intellectual understanding of God but for many years, I didn't strive to know Him. Over the past few years, I have really wanted to know God. I think that desire has come with my increased awareness of His grace.

When I went through periods where I asked for forgiveness but didn't feel worthy of accepting it, I didn't want an intimate relationship with God. As I have learned to accept His mercy, to let it cover me, to have joy in the comfort of His forgiveness, I have yearned to know God very personally. In some ways, it's still a scary proposition (because it will require more changes in me) but I know it will lead me to more peace, more joy and more comfort.

I do want to know God. I want to seek Him and I want to surrender my life to him. It's not an easy thing for me. The question was raised last night, what does surrender mean? One of the thoughts I had was that it meant to quit fighting against something. I suppose that's the way I feel at times - that I'm fighting against God for changes He wants in my life. I need to quit the fight against God and join the battle against sin, against Satan.

I want to know God, I just need to start acting on that desire.