Peace is an elusive thing. I love seasons of peace whether it's for a day, a week...only a few minutes. The calm, the serenity of knowing everything is OK. Maybe it's just me but those seasons of peace come and go and I'm not always aware of their coming or going. Sometimes it's over a course of hours and days, sometimes it's immediate (and I think I hate the immediate going the most). I never knew what peace was like until I really began to understand what God is like. I remember times when I thought things were good, manageable at least and I thought that was peace but it wasn't. It wasn't the peace I've found that holds me in the hardest of times, that allows me to hurt but to believe that God is sovereign, that He knows my pain and He is going to help me heal and recover. Knowing that, feeling that when I am in the midst of a storm is the craziest thing I have ever experienced but there are some storms that get so dark, I lose focus of who is in control and resort to trying to find my own way again and that is when I lose the peace, when all seems hectic, when I feel panic setting in, when I start grasping for something to hold onto and become defensive.
I want peace in my life; not a stress-free life, not a life of riches and health, only a knowledge that God never lets go, never walks away, never hides or hopes I will simply drift off but remains steadfast in His overwhelming flood of love for me.
I told a friend the other day I was ready to be with God and I think it freaked him out a little bit. I could only ask him what the ultimate hope of being a Christian is if it's not spending eternity with God. He asked why I didn't want to wait around and see what goes on. All I could say was that I can't imagine anything here being as good as what God has waiting for me but I want to live in the moment while I am here since this seems to be where God wants me right now. When it's His time, it will be my time. Until then, it is well with my soul.
These guys played at the conference I was attending last week and this song is all over me right now.
Grace and peace to you.
1 comment:
Peace is certainly elusive and often the storms are unpredictable in their appearance.
Being with God: I told my youngest son yesterday that I wanted to be in heaven more than on this earth and he immediately said that it sounds like I want to die. I said no, I don't want to die, but heaven is going to be so much better than this earth that I can't wait to see Jesus in His glory as He really is.
I'm not ready to check out from this life unless God calls me, but when the call comes... I can only imagine what my eyes will soon see.
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