I feel like I'm stuck in neutral. I have a desire to do things for the kingdom yet each day I feel like I am just going through the motions to get through the day. My prayer life is in neutral. My reading is in neutral. My journaling is in neutral. Oddly, while I feel completely in neutral, I have people from a Bible study I lead at work telling me how meaningful some of the things I mentioned meant to them or helped them in how they see things in their life. I'm thankful because all I ask is that God will speak through me and it makes me wonder if I feel like I'm in neutral simply because I'm not trying to be in control as has been my custom for many years. Maybe I am in neutral and allowing God to work but I wouldn't expect to feel like I'm in neutral if that's the case. I'm baffled.
I am looking forward to the coming weeks of our workplace Bible study. I will be leading a study through one of my favorite books, Crazy Love. I expect to lose my feeling of neutral while going back through Chan's book because it has moved me so deeply in the past. Or, maybe I'll feel the same as I ask God to again speak loudly and deliberately through me during that study.
Grace and peace to you.
2 comments:
I think you have a very astute observation about being in neutral and allowing God to work in your life.
You may feel like you're in neutral right now, but you're not really in neutral. You know what I'm saying?
I've learned (at least a little) that God doesn't shift gears like I do. When I try to shift the gears, I keep it in low gear too long, stay in high gear or overdrive too long, or I just flat out grind the gears till my transmission is wrecked.
You're not really in neutral. If you watch and listen closely, God is in the driver's seat and he's revving up the engine. Where he takes you will be just the place you need to go and at just the right pace.
Well-said, Kyle.
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