I'm listening to Third Day and thinking about Lynard Skynard as I write this so Freebird just seemed like the right title for the moment.
I'm on my way to NYC and hoping for 0 plane problems and good weather. Nothing like a software conference to get me jazzed up. Woohoo! I am planning on sneaking in a Yankees game so getting to see Yankee stadium will make it a little better.
I don't like the Yankees but can't cheer for the Blue Jays either so I'll just be there to soak in the sights.
I'm not excited about missing class tonight. It's going to be a great night of prayer and sharing among our youth group. I love just getting to watch them and see God at work in their hearts.
I start school next Monday. YIKES! I did get a 100 in the Student Orientation program but it was really simple. I doubt all the projects will be so generous. I'm excited but also a bit nervous. My first round of school wasn't a great experience on the grading front but I think my motivations are a bit different now.
I'm so thankful for friends that challenge me to be a better person and a better Christ-follower. I'll ask you to pray for some friends who are doing great things in the kingdom with people that most would overlook and pray that their efforts will be fruitful. I hope to join them again soon and be the hands and feet of Jesus to suffering people.
That is all for today. Unless something fascinating happens in the next two days I'm likely done blogging until next week.
Grace and peace to you.
Sometimes I write before I think - caveat reader. The written ramblings of a spiritual schizophrenic. Romans 7:19
Wednesday, April 27, 2011
Tuesday, April 26, 2011
Markers
We mark a lot of events. Birthdays (happy birthday Shannon!) and anniversaries are maybe the most common but we also mark the bad days and bad events. I'm not sure if many people are like me but I tend to remember the bad markers better than the good markers. Sunday was one of those markers, an anniversary of sorts that is a painful reminder of something lost. It's odd that I would spend the day vacillating between it being a day of resurrection and hope and a day of what is dead and lost, not odd that I would be thinking about one or the other but that they occurred on the same day. I was fortunate to be with a great church family and some very, very dear friends that day but I also needed and wanted some time alone to process, to cry, to read and maybe to heal a little. I was granted both time with others and time alone on Sunday.
I often wish I could have a do-over. There are so many choices I don't think I'd make again. I realize that many of my choices have led me to where I am and I don't get the do-over so where do I go from here? Well, I'll start by crying out to Jesus for help, for guidance, for courage, for strength to take the next step, to keep moving forward and to use my experiences, good or bad, to help others who are crying out for help too. I've been told by some people I couldn't have reached them without some of my experiences. Honestly, it's a tool I wish I didn't have but it is what it is and my next step to growing closer to God is to use what I have and what he is giving me and go from there. I can't rewrite the past but I can work on making the right decision today. So, I'll keep crying out to Jesus to lead me.
Grace and peace to you.
I often wish I could have a do-over. There are so many choices I don't think I'd make again. I realize that many of my choices have led me to where I am and I don't get the do-over so where do I go from here? Well, I'll start by crying out to Jesus for help, for guidance, for courage, for strength to take the next step, to keep moving forward and to use my experiences, good or bad, to help others who are crying out for help too. I've been told by some people I couldn't have reached them without some of my experiences. Honestly, it's a tool I wish I didn't have but it is what it is and my next step to growing closer to God is to use what I have and what he is giving me and go from there. I can't rewrite the past but I can work on making the right decision today. So, I'll keep crying out to Jesus to lead me.
Grace and peace to you.
Monday, April 25, 2011
Hope
Yesterday wasn't the best of days for me which is hard to say relative to what the day was about. I'm thankful it was a day about hope. Maybe I'll say more about it this week.
I spent the weekend listening to Third Day. So many of their songs speak to me and so I will be sharing some of those this week.
I am thankful to be one of the children of God and I will rejoice in knowing he loves me.
Grace and peace to you.
I spent the weekend listening to Third Day. So many of their songs speak to me and so I will be sharing some of those this week.
I am thankful to be one of the children of God and I will rejoice in knowing he loves me.
Grace and peace to you.
Friday, April 22, 2011
Things Learned in the Airport
Wednesday was a not-so-fun day at the airport. My first flight back was delayed, then delayed again, then delayed again. They got me booked on another flight because the problem was a hydraulic leak and it can take hours to find those. So, I was excited to get on a plane leaving at 2:00, then 2:30 and finally 2:50 because I would still get home in time for church. Uh, negative Ghostrider. The pilot comes on just minutes into our flight to let us know that the landing gear wasn't working properly, we would fly in circles long enough to burn off 10,000 pounds of fuel and then give the landing a go and let us know there would be firetrucks and all the emergency response folks standing by. The landing was fine and all was well. Here are some random thoughts.
During the delay, I was in line with a man from Chile who was VERY upset about the delays and wanted everyone to know.
I was also in line with a couple from Brazil who felt very inconvenienced that the plane was delayed and thought they should move to the front of the line to be serviced first since they were sitting in first class.
There are some people who get really mad when someone tries to cut in line.
Mad women are the most persuasive in getting people to quit cutting in line.
The ladies working the desk must be given some type of sedative to stand there, take the heat and not pull a gun on someone.
During a flight in which people think there's the possibility of a very bad ending, there are multiple ways of handling the stress but applause seems the general consensus when everyone realizes the plane isn't going to explode.
A husband asked to switch seats so he could sit by his wife. The whole time they were sitting together, he never held her hand. I thought it odd but give him credit for at least moving to be closer to her.
Some people use humor in stressful situations. Sometimes it's very bad humor and they would do better to put a gag in their mouth.
Some people get real nervous and real quiet but the fear in their eyes is evident.
I felt like I was at peace the whole time knowing the ending could be THE END. I wasn't in control of anything so I said a couple of prayers for the pilots and the souls onboard.
I did realize I need to leave a note of what life insurance policies I have before I fly out again on Wednesday.
After defying death (yes, that's a bit exaggerated but it makes for good drama), you'd think people would be happier and counting their blessings. Not the man from Chile. Instead, he exhibited what it's like when a horse's behind actually speaks.
If I was a desk agent and a little man from Chile said the things to me he said to that poor lady, someone would lose a head and someone would wind up in jail I think.
All in all, I was just glad to get home 9 hours late and sleep, all to briefly, in my own bed.
The song that kept cycling through my head the whole trip was "It Is Well". I want to be able to live it out daily. The ups, the downs, the victories, the challenges, I want to face it all knowing whatever comes my way, it is well with my soul.
Grace and peace to you.
During the delay, I was in line with a man from Chile who was VERY upset about the delays and wanted everyone to know.
I was also in line with a couple from Brazil who felt very inconvenienced that the plane was delayed and thought they should move to the front of the line to be serviced first since they were sitting in first class.
There are some people who get really mad when someone tries to cut in line.
Mad women are the most persuasive in getting people to quit cutting in line.
The ladies working the desk must be given some type of sedative to stand there, take the heat and not pull a gun on someone.
During a flight in which people think there's the possibility of a very bad ending, there are multiple ways of handling the stress but applause seems the general consensus when everyone realizes the plane isn't going to explode.
A husband asked to switch seats so he could sit by his wife. The whole time they were sitting together, he never held her hand. I thought it odd but give him credit for at least moving to be closer to her.
Some people use humor in stressful situations. Sometimes it's very bad humor and they would do better to put a gag in their mouth.
Some people get real nervous and real quiet but the fear in their eyes is evident.
I felt like I was at peace the whole time knowing the ending could be THE END. I wasn't in control of anything so I said a couple of prayers for the pilots and the souls onboard.
I did realize I need to leave a note of what life insurance policies I have before I fly out again on Wednesday.
After defying death (yes, that's a bit exaggerated but it makes for good drama), you'd think people would be happier and counting their blessings. Not the man from Chile. Instead, he exhibited what it's like when a horse's behind actually speaks.
If I was a desk agent and a little man from Chile said the things to me he said to that poor lady, someone would lose a head and someone would wind up in jail I think.
All in all, I was just glad to get home 9 hours late and sleep, all to briefly, in my own bed.
The song that kept cycling through my head the whole trip was "It Is Well". I want to be able to live it out daily. The ups, the downs, the victories, the challenges, I want to face it all knowing whatever comes my way, it is well with my soul.
Grace and peace to you.
Wednesday, April 20, 2011
The Power of Words
I'm in Las Vegas so I'm stealing content for the blog today.
The power of my words is something I don't always harness or approach with caution. Lord, help me say the things you want said, help me to use my words to encourage, build up and offer help.
Grace and peace to you.
The power of my words is something I don't always harness or approach with caution. Lord, help me say the things you want said, help me to use my words to encourage, build up and offer help.
Grace and peace to you.
Tuesday, April 19, 2011
The Babbling Brook
That's kind of how I feel about this post today. Just babbling. I'm on my way to Las Vegas. Woohoo. I've got $5,000 in cash and I'm ready to win big. Truth is I'm on my way to Vegas and I have $40 in my pocket because I don't see myself gambling too much. One the last trip I wagered $3 and won $6 I think. I am OVER THE TOP. Ha-ha. I'm ready to take care of business (the real reason for the trip) and get home.
I saw the lead-in to Entertainment Tonight Monday night and wanted to throw the remote at the TV. The Royal Wedding? Seriously, is that the most important thing people have on their plate? Contrast that with a Facebook post by a friend on Saturday that he was with his church youth group in downtown Dallas trying to serve the homeless.
I'm glad I've attained perfection so I can criticize others.
That's a BIG joke folks. Still, how much press can 2 people getting married receive as well as Charlie Sheen and whether Susan Lucci is going to join Desperate Housewives? Do these people not know the Rangers game is on TV?
I don't know what to say after watching the news and watching the homes burning near Possum Kingdom lake except, "Lord, send rain and protect the firefighters and others who are putting their lives on the line and those who are volunteering their time."
I've been keeping up with some Facebook posts by several who are debating the existence of a literal hell. It's another argument that does draw some interest from me but one that, in the end, matters little to me. Maybe it will be a bigger issue to know these answers one day but for now, I just want to love God with all my heart, soul, mind and strength and serve others as I believe he has called me to do and prepare for an eternity in heaven. Now, I'm not going to start telling everyone to enjoy life on earth and live it up because they have a free pass to heaven because I don't believe that is what the Bible says but if I get to heaven and it's filled up with people who claimed to be non-believers, murderers, drug users, liars, and whoever else God decides is worthy to be there, I'll say HALLELUJAH and ask to be pointed to the fly fishing area. (I also want to know where the golf course is so I can go say hi to Rick.)
To that end, if and when I have all the facts about everything God knows, I'll share it here. Until then, I'll post what I believe, be willing to listen to other ideas and try to know more about my incredible father and Lord.
Grace and peace to you.
I saw the lead-in to Entertainment Tonight Monday night and wanted to throw the remote at the TV. The Royal Wedding? Seriously, is that the most important thing people have on their plate? Contrast that with a Facebook post by a friend on Saturday that he was with his church youth group in downtown Dallas trying to serve the homeless.
I'm glad I've attained perfection so I can criticize others.
That's a BIG joke folks. Still, how much press can 2 people getting married receive as well as Charlie Sheen and whether Susan Lucci is going to join Desperate Housewives? Do these people not know the Rangers game is on TV?
I don't know what to say after watching the news and watching the homes burning near Possum Kingdom lake except, "Lord, send rain and protect the firefighters and others who are putting their lives on the line and those who are volunteering their time."
I've been keeping up with some Facebook posts by several who are debating the existence of a literal hell. It's another argument that does draw some interest from me but one that, in the end, matters little to me. Maybe it will be a bigger issue to know these answers one day but for now, I just want to love God with all my heart, soul, mind and strength and serve others as I believe he has called me to do and prepare for an eternity in heaven. Now, I'm not going to start telling everyone to enjoy life on earth and live it up because they have a free pass to heaven because I don't believe that is what the Bible says but if I get to heaven and it's filled up with people who claimed to be non-believers, murderers, drug users, liars, and whoever else God decides is worthy to be there, I'll say HALLELUJAH and ask to be pointed to the fly fishing area. (I also want to know where the golf course is so I can go say hi to Rick.)
To that end, if and when I have all the facts about everything God knows, I'll share it here. Until then, I'll post what I believe, be willing to listen to other ideas and try to know more about my incredible father and Lord.
Grace and peace to you.
Friday, April 15, 2011
Roll The Stone Away
Easter is coming and one song I always think about and haven't heard in years is Roll That Stone Away sung by Acapella. I used to have it on a cassette tape (yep, that long ago) and played it until the tape was worn out I think and haven't found the CD it was recorded on. Thank heavens for youtube.com.
Here's the song and let me tell you, if you don't start keeping the beat with your foot or hand if not just flat-out dancing around the room (my preferred listening style), you better check your pulse because I think you might be dead.
Grace and peace to you.
Here's the song and let me tell you, if you don't start keeping the beat with your foot or hand if not just flat-out dancing around the room (my preferred listening style), you better check your pulse because I think you might be dead.
Grace and peace to you.
Thursday, April 14, 2011
Brought To Tears
First, I've gone too long without a post about the Rangers. 8-3 (EDIT: A reader pointed out the Rangers are 9-3. That's the danger in writing a post in advance and then coming back to edit it later. And the mad cow disease.) now and not in World Series form the past 2 games. Still, I remember a start just 3 years ago that was more like 3-8.
Josh Hamilton went down yesterday with a broken something in his shoulder and is out 4-6 weeks. That's a tough break for the Rangers but something I think they will come to expect with Hamilton and something that will be a big factor in his contract talks. I usually get frustrated with players who are hurt often but I feel differently about Hamilton. Yes, I'm a fan and probably jaded but having read his book and knowing what he battles, I cheer for him to keep coming back, to keep overcoming obstacles, to stick to the straight path when the pain of hurting and not playing is what led him down a crooked road before. I want him to succeed simply because I see some of my life wrapped up in his ups-and-downs and realize life is about more than baseball, more than a stint on the DL and more than homeruns. It's about getting back up when you've been knocked down, even when you've brought so much pain on yourself, and moving forward in a positive direction. Yep, I'm an unabashed Hamilton fan to the end.
_________________________________________
OK, the brought to tears part. I'm a fairly emotional guy and the kids in our youth group got to me last night. Jacob brought a lesson about making war against our sins and at the end of class offered them the opportunity to write their sins on the board to share with their friends and the people they want praying for them. Yes, you read that correctly. Our teenagers were openly writing their sins on the board and it brought me to tears. Their honesty, their openness, their hearts desiring to be closer to God, their trust. It was moving to me, someone who tried for years to hide my faults and failings.
I'm so thankful for a leader like Jacob who has a such a great big heart for God and for our youth and I'm thankful for a group of young people who want to live authentically and grow in their relationship with God. It was a powerful thing for an old guy to experience.
Grace and peace to you.
Josh Hamilton went down yesterday with a broken something in his shoulder and is out 4-6 weeks. That's a tough break for the Rangers but something I think they will come to expect with Hamilton and something that will be a big factor in his contract talks. I usually get frustrated with players who are hurt often but I feel differently about Hamilton. Yes, I'm a fan and probably jaded but having read his book and knowing what he battles, I cheer for him to keep coming back, to keep overcoming obstacles, to stick to the straight path when the pain of hurting and not playing is what led him down a crooked road before. I want him to succeed simply because I see some of my life wrapped up in his ups-and-downs and realize life is about more than baseball, more than a stint on the DL and more than homeruns. It's about getting back up when you've been knocked down, even when you've brought so much pain on yourself, and moving forward in a positive direction. Yep, I'm an unabashed Hamilton fan to the end.
_________________________________________
OK, the brought to tears part. I'm a fairly emotional guy and the kids in our youth group got to me last night. Jacob brought a lesson about making war against our sins and at the end of class offered them the opportunity to write their sins on the board to share with their friends and the people they want praying for them. Yes, you read that correctly. Our teenagers were openly writing their sins on the board and it brought me to tears. Their honesty, their openness, their hearts desiring to be closer to God, their trust. It was moving to me, someone who tried for years to hide my faults and failings.
I'm so thankful for a leader like Jacob who has a such a great big heart for God and for our youth and I'm thankful for a group of young people who want to live authentically and grow in their relationship with God. It was a powerful thing for an old guy to experience.
Grace and peace to you.
Wednesday, April 13, 2011
Brandon
God allowed me to cross paths with Brandon this past weekend. Brandon is the guy who reminds me that whatever my pain is, there is someone out there with more pain than me and more pain than I want to come my way. His parents were busted for cooking meth when he was about 13. He bounced between families for awhile. He's been in jail, two brothers are in jail, one brother is handicapped, the mother is now married to a not-so-nice guy and his wife had just kicked him out because he doesn't have a job and can't find work right now. He also has some self-esteem issues because of what he's lived through and he has Trichotillomania. He was trying to get somewhere to stay and didn't have the money to buy gas to get there. A friend of mine gave him gas money and another friend got to share some experiences and words from God and I got to be in the presence of one of God's hurting children. I got a reminder of how blessed I am. I got a reminder that the suffering I experience may be bad, may be the worst thing I've ever known but it is temporary. I've been knocked down and landed on my feet. Brandon has been knocked down and kicked while he was still down. I think he wants a relationship with God but he can't see how to get there today because he's fighting to survive, to keep a family together, to take care of a brother no one else wants to, to find a job so he can eat - problems I cannot comprehend.
I was blessed to be able to pray with Brandon, to ask God to fill him with peace, to allow him to see what God has in store for him and to ask God to put healing into Brandon's life surrounding him with God's love and anyone else that God can lead his way that will help Brandon see that he is a child, worthy to be called a son of God just as he is.
I am thankful to have met Brandon and I do hope God will cross our paths again and allow me to be some light into his life.
Oh Lord, please allow me to glorify you and to be light to those who are hurting, who are lost, who are wandering, who are being beaten down by this world and the pain that it holds. Work through me so I may say your words and bring hope to someone who is or has lost it.
Grace and peace to you.
I was blessed to be able to pray with Brandon, to ask God to fill him with peace, to allow him to see what God has in store for him and to ask God to put healing into Brandon's life surrounding him with God's love and anyone else that God can lead his way that will help Brandon see that he is a child, worthy to be called a son of God just as he is.
I am thankful to have met Brandon and I do hope God will cross our paths again and allow me to be some light into his life.
Oh Lord, please allow me to glorify you and to be light to those who are hurting, who are lost, who are wandering, who are being beaten down by this world and the pain that it holds. Work through me so I may say your words and bring hope to someone who is or has lost it.
Grace and peace to you.
Tuesday, April 12, 2011
Happy Birthday
Today is the birthday of a very, very good friend. He is someone who has consistently spoken joy and hope into my life. He is someone who has spurred me to be a better person, even more, to know God more intimately. He shared his love of mission work with me and encouraged me to experience the great commission personally. He has loved me when I have told him the darkest, ugliest secrets of my life and he has prayed for me without ceasing. He is my friend but he is so much more than that. He is my brother and someone I love without condition. Happy birthday Everett.
I'm still baffled when people don't believe we are twins though. I'm on the left and Everett is on the right.
Monday night was another great night for Wise County Christian Counseling. The work being done by Beverly, Jenna and Staci is incredible and hundreds of people are being helped. They helped 292 families in 2010. 292! That's awesome but there is still a waiting list to get in. The other cool thing to me is that our average revenue per session is $38. Most people pay $100 at a minimum for a counseling session so we know we are achieving our mission of bringing excellent, Christ-centered counseling to people who couldn't afford it otherwise. The people there last night and many others play an integral role in bringing hope to the hurting through their donations to WCCC so our counselors can continue to do what they do to offer hope, healing and reconciliation to others.
We had a great financial response last night and I know those people and many others are praying that God will continue to use WCCC for his glory.
We were blessed to hear from Janet White last night, the widow of Randy White who was a Bridgeport Police officer who was murdered in the line of duty. Janet is an incredible woman and I know she is a source of help strength for many people through what she has suffered and through her faith in God.
“A new command I give you: Love one another [emphasis mine]. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another [emphasis mine].” - John 13:34-35
Grace and peace to you.
I'm still baffled when people don't believe we are twins though. I'm on the left and Everett is on the right.
Monday night was another great night for Wise County Christian Counseling. The work being done by Beverly, Jenna and Staci is incredible and hundreds of people are being helped. They helped 292 families in 2010. 292! That's awesome but there is still a waiting list to get in. The other cool thing to me is that our average revenue per session is $38. Most people pay $100 at a minimum for a counseling session so we know we are achieving our mission of bringing excellent, Christ-centered counseling to people who couldn't afford it otherwise. The people there last night and many others play an integral role in bringing hope to the hurting through their donations to WCCC so our counselors can continue to do what they do to offer hope, healing and reconciliation to others.
We had a great financial response last night and I know those people and many others are praying that God will continue to use WCCC for his glory.
We were blessed to hear from Janet White last night, the widow of Randy White who was a Bridgeport Police officer who was murdered in the line of duty. Janet is an incredible woman and I know she is a source of help strength for many people through what she has suffered and through her faith in God.
“A new command I give you: Love one another [emphasis mine]. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another [emphasis mine].” - John 13:34-35
Grace and peace to you.
Monday, April 11, 2011
Monday Madness
The fires in West Texas this weekend were horrible to watch on TV. Over 80,000 acres burned and the fire was 0% contained at one point Saturday night. On Sunday night there was a bunch of wet stuff falling out of the air. I still haven't identified what it is.
The government almost shut down last week. I think it would be great if we could lay off Congress for a year. The whole uproar about all the bad things that "could" happen with the government shut down was a bunching of meaningless murmuring to me as I reflect on school teachers being laid off and children potentially losing educational opportunities.
I have 0% faith in our current government. There isn't a politician I trust and you can't sustain a country with trillions of dollars in debt. Someone will have to pay and I believe it will be our enemies picking up the tab as they take over a country that was founded on principles and sacrifices that our current legislators have forsaken.
I'm thankful my full faith and trust is resting on one who is greater than this country and greater than anything this world can offer or take away.
And Lord haste the day when my faith shall be sight,
The clouds be rolled back as a scroll.
It is well with my soul.
They sang this song at the funeral of 14 year-old Travis Sitzman last week and I thought it a perfect hymn to sing during such a time when what has happened cannot be understood. I want to live a life so wrapped up in God that whatever happens, good or bad, understood or confusing, it will be well with my soul.
Grace and peace to you.
The government almost shut down last week. I think it would be great if we could lay off Congress for a year. The whole uproar about all the bad things that "could" happen with the government shut down was a bunching of meaningless murmuring to me as I reflect on school teachers being laid off and children potentially losing educational opportunities.
I have 0% faith in our current government. There isn't a politician I trust and you can't sustain a country with trillions of dollars in debt. Someone will have to pay and I believe it will be our enemies picking up the tab as they take over a country that was founded on principles and sacrifices that our current legislators have forsaken.
I'm thankful my full faith and trust is resting on one who is greater than this country and greater than anything this world can offer or take away.
And Lord haste the day when my faith shall be sight,
The clouds be rolled back as a scroll.
It is well with my soul.
They sang this song at the funeral of 14 year-old Travis Sitzman last week and I thought it a perfect hymn to sing during such a time when what has happened cannot be understood. I want to live a life so wrapped up in God that whatever happens, good or bad, understood or confusing, it will be well with my soul.
Grace and peace to you.
Wednesday, April 06, 2011
If You Love Jesus...
...live like it.
I need to be reminded that I should love Jesus because of who he is and what he has done because he loves me completely; not because I can go to heaven now but because he loves me so very, very much.
I look forward to Bible study today. I think there will be some powerful stories shared and hearts changed - all because Jesus loves everyone who will be there.
I want to live in such a way that people know I love Jesus completely.
Grace and peace to you.
I need to be reminded that I should love Jesus because of who he is and what he has done because he loves me completely; not because I can go to heaven now but because he loves me so very, very much.
I look forward to Bible study today. I think there will be some powerful stories shared and hearts changed - all because Jesus loves everyone who will be there.
I want to live in such a way that people know I love Jesus completely.
Grace and peace to you.
Tuesday, April 05, 2011
4-0, UConn and 1 Loss
I'm sitting here thinking how exciting it is that the Rangers are 4-0 behind real good pitching and a bunch of homeruns. Honestly, I wish the Rangers were grinding out runs instead of hitting bombs because the bats will cool off but, hey, I'll enjoy it while I can.
I'm sitting here after just watching One Shining Moment which is played at the end of every Final 4. I love the videos and good for UConn and their big win. I wish Butler could have pulled one out, similar to Texas Western many moons ago, except without the racial overtones.
I'm sitting here wondering how the parents of a 14 year old boy who was found dead Sunday morning are coping because I cannot fathom what they are going through.
The Rangers are 4-0, UConn is the National Champion for a brief while and the Sitzman family will not see their young son grow up. Two of those things make me happy but it's fleeting and one of those things just gnaws at my gut while I wonder why.
It's a question I won't know an answer to but it upsets me all the same. It makes me ask God "why?" without expecting an answer. It makes me want to touch my kids, to see their smile, to hear their voice. I'm fortunate to only be separated from them for brief periods but they are excruciating periods of time.
I wonder if God feels that way about me. I wonder if he wants me in heaven with him as soon as possible or if he's content because he can see me here and now. Another question I won't have an answer to anytime soon. Nor do I need one.
However, it's times like this when my faith is shakier. It's times like this when I have more questions than contentment. Still, I know that God's ways are not my ways and I cannot begin to comprehend all his thoughts. I hope I will wake up in the morning and simply be willing to follow his direction.
Grace and peace to you.
I'm sitting here after just watching One Shining Moment which is played at the end of every Final 4. I love the videos and good for UConn and their big win. I wish Butler could have pulled one out, similar to Texas Western many moons ago, except without the racial overtones.
I'm sitting here wondering how the parents of a 14 year old boy who was found dead Sunday morning are coping because I cannot fathom what they are going through.
The Rangers are 4-0, UConn is the National Champion for a brief while and the Sitzman family will not see their young son grow up. Two of those things make me happy but it's fleeting and one of those things just gnaws at my gut while I wonder why.
It's a question I won't know an answer to but it upsets me all the same. It makes me ask God "why?" without expecting an answer. It makes me want to touch my kids, to see their smile, to hear their voice. I'm fortunate to only be separated from them for brief periods but they are excruciating periods of time.
I wonder if God feels that way about me. I wonder if he wants me in heaven with him as soon as possible or if he's content because he can see me here and now. Another question I won't have an answer to anytime soon. Nor do I need one.
However, it's times like this when my faith is shakier. It's times like this when I have more questions than contentment. Still, I know that God's ways are not my ways and I cannot begin to comprehend all his thoughts. I hope I will wake up in the morning and simply be willing to follow his direction.
Grace and peace to you.
Friday, April 01, 2011
Fascinating Day
Wednesday was fascinating. It was a day of highs and a day of lows.
I enjoy seeing what God can do. I was in a study with 3 other guys who have seen hard times, who have not stood up to the challenges the evil one placed before them but who have walked the road back towards a loving father who is ready to embrace them. No matter what comes my way, to have a day where I can be surrounded by people who want to pursue a relationship with God is an encouraging day.
God has already overcome evil and with his help, I can overcome it too. My time with guys who are overcoming the lure of sin by learning to rely daily on God, a little more each day, is time that encourages me to do the same...to chase the heart of God with passion.
Thank you Lord for letting me see what you can do in hearts that are open to your ways.
Grace and peace to you.
I enjoy seeing what God can do. I was in a study with 3 other guys who have seen hard times, who have not stood up to the challenges the evil one placed before them but who have walked the road back towards a loving father who is ready to embrace them. No matter what comes my way, to have a day where I can be surrounded by people who want to pursue a relationship with God is an encouraging day.
God has already overcome evil and with his help, I can overcome it too. My time with guys who are overcoming the lure of sin by learning to rely daily on God, a little more each day, is time that encourages me to do the same...to chase the heart of God with passion.
Thank you Lord for letting me see what you can do in hearts that are open to your ways.
Grace and peace to you.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)